Top 13: Binary option expert im Vergleich: Die große ...

Hot Tub Hawk And The Pissed Off Colonel

Well! Here we are again. Everyone is sitting around this internet campfire, anxiously awaiting another Hawk story. Some of you are making S'mores. Others have crammed a stick into a hotdog and are now roasting it. I "Cope" with life and have a fat dip in. The only person I don't see is Hawk. Wait. There he is, and he keeps sticking his fingers into the fire to, "make sure it's still hot." I wonder if there is still a need to detail how mentally deficient or completely oblivious Hawk is? I strongly encourage you to read my previous stories if you have not been formally introduced to Hawk. I suspect you will continue to read anyways, so I offer you this: Hawk is the type of guy that gets into a spelling argument with his tattoo artist and walks out proud of his two-inch sized font forehead tattoo that reads "No Regerts."
We were in beautiful Iraq, a charming vacation destination for thousands of Americans. The vacation was all inclusive. The local women dressed like Pac-Man ghosts or ninjas, and countryside smelled like raw sewage and regret. Most of the locals were very hospitable, but some of the locals had a very strong desire to shout, "Praise Allah" while simultaneously trying to kill us. I am not bothered by much. Every human is entitled to their beliefs. We are also entitled to our own opinions. For example, I don't personally feel "man-dresses" and flip-flops are suitable combat attire, but who am I too judge? The only time I have an issue with people is when they are actively trying to kill me. I don't know why, but it really pisses me off. That and grape jelly.
We worked out of two different locations during this deployment. The majority of my Battalion worked out of a medium-sized Forward Operating Base (FOB), but we also operated out of a smaller FOB. We typically stayed at this other location for about ten days, and would rotate with another Platoon. The location was not horrible, but I personally hated the transient lifestyle. We lived out of our ruck-sacks, and had to find ways to occupy our time when we were not conducting raids or other missions. We didn't have the luxuries we had at "home." There were no gaming systems or large televisions. We simply had find ways to occupy ourselves.
Football was the game of choice for a couple weeks, then it got blacklisted. It had nothing to do with the ball being pigskin either. It was mostly due to poor mission analysis. Football was one of the few things we could all do and actually enjoyed, until it was too dark to play. We had a brilliant and genius idea. We fucking "own the night" with our Night Vision Goggle (NVGs), so why don't we rent it for a couple hours to finish the game? Game on Garth! We thought of everything. We drenched that infidel ball in Infrared (IR) chemlight (Glow Stick) juice. The depth perception problem was immediately evident. House took a fucking laser beam pass to the to the face. Two black eyes builds character though.
We can work through it though. His NVGs were still Fully Mission Capable (FMC), and we all realized that we needed to be a bit quicker. The fourth play from scrimmage was undoubtedly the best, and worst football play in the history of Iraq football. Fuck punting. We were going for it. It would have been easy to confuse Tony, our quarterback for Michael Vick from the shotgun. Tony was a Michael Vick with NVGs, and without the dog fighting felony. Tony evaded numerous rushers and then superbly delivered a fifty yard completion to Ryan. It was beautiful to watch, until it wasn't. NVG's are great, but they don't offer the same Field of View (FOV) your eye-nuggets offer. Ryan thought he was all alone and started a leisurely stroll to the end-zone. The he got fucking nuked from the top and bottom, in fucking reverse directions. Sure, Ryan broke a finger and required "some" stitches. Oh and they broke three sets of NVGs in one play, but damn that was a glorious fucking hit. It was first-and-ten, but our Platoon Sergeant was less than happy. Game off Wayne!
We were now bored again. There was another unit on the FOB with us, but they were not fans of us. The only real interaction we had was when their full-bird Colonel told us to, "stay the fuck away from his Soldiers." I don't know if one of the other Platoons ruined it for us, but the guy was just a complete prick to us.
We did our best to keep our reverse schedule, but it was just so boring during the evenings we were not working. The majority of us resorted to playing Spades or Echure, and others read. Hawk and a handful of others would take nightly showers and then seemed to vanish. "Knowledge is power" and I knew Hawk was utterly powerless. I knew better than to ever let that retarded bird spread his wings and fly solo. I didn't see any reason to worry though. The other people Hawk was with were far smarter than Hawk woud ever be. Furthermore, with football now off the table, there was really no way for anyone to get in trouble at this FOB.
Imagine Hawk in a cattle chute. If I put a box labeled "commonsense" on the opposite end, Hawk would never fucking find it. In a place he literally has no option but to find it, he would NOT FIND IT. EVER. However, if I had a box labeled "worst decision ever" and dropped it in the ocean, Hawk would fucking somehow stumble upon the lost city of Atlantis. I had never really got my ass chewed before I became Hawk's leader, but that trend went out the window when I inherited him.
We lived on the second floor, and my bunk was closest to the door that rotation. Thankfully too. I was woken up when I heard, "I want to talk to one of your leaders." I didn't know "who" was in trouble, but I had Hawk so I knew it was best to simply put my shoes on and assume I was in trouble by proxy. I didn't even wait to see if I would get to sit on the Green Army Weenie, I just spit in my hand and readied my o-ring for maximal insertion. It was too early for the sun to even be out, and I was already willingly walking to my execution. My how things had changed so quickly.
I walk outside and I see five Soldiers, one Hawk, and a fucking pissed of Colonel (COL).
COL: Are you their leader?
OP: I am one of them. How can I help you Sir?
COL: Do you know where I caught them?
This is where I would typically say something stupid, but this guy didn't look happy, and I didn't want to give him a reason to wake up someone who "may" have gave a shit as to why he was irate.
OP: No Sir. I don't.
COL: Above MY SHOWER?
I was now pissed. There was a large shower tent in the middle of large open courtyard. One half was male and the other was female. These fucking morons were spying on naked females? I want to kill them for listening to Hawk. Well, I assumed it was a Hawk idea. Like Hawk's brain, I was putting the cart before the horse. I assume it was Hawk, but I had questions.
OP: How in the fuck did you guys get on top the shower tent?
I was working myself into a frenzy. My brain does not operate like normal people brains. I was pretty pissed considering they violated the privacy of the beautiful ladies at the FOB, but I was actually more pissed they got on top of a fucking tent. They seemingly forgot everything about military tactics and got caught; that was the foremost reason for my anger. The spying on deployment 1's (binary thingy) was second. Considerably a far worse offense, but second at the point in time.
COL: NO. Not the shower tent. On my personal shower.
What? This guy was so special, he had a personal shower. What, he was too good to use the pallet floored showers like the rest of us? So maybe the Romanians (We think anyways) occasionally shit on the pallets and waffle-stomped the poop through the pallets, but the water pressure was phenomenal.
OP: You have a personal shower Sir, and they were on top?
COL: YES. I caught them in my water tank.
Well, back to being puzzled. I don't judge. I personally don't care if penis gazing is your hobby, but there are five of you? Why don't you just unleash your hogs and stare at each others? Anyways, how in the fuck did they all fit into the water tank? What the fuck did they do when they got inside? My god, my brain was running wild with unsightly pictures.
OP: My apologies Sir, but how did they all fit into your water tank?
COL: Come with my Sergeant; so you understand what I am talking about.
OP: You mother fuckers can wait for me in, the front-leaning-rest (Push-up position).
I still wasn't certain I entirely cared, but I thought this would may demonstrate that I showed concern about his fucking one-person shower. COL Prick then lead me around the side of the building and showed me his water tank. It was fucking huge. It was one of the typical hard plastic tanks, but the entire top had been cut off. God knows why, not like it was ever dusty in Iraq, but the top was no-more. It all made sense now. They weren't gay; they were chilling in a makeshift hot tub! Well, the gayness thing is up in the air, but I guess they were too loud while he was showering!?! I apologized profusely, but COL Prick had me locked up at the position of attention for at least ten minutes just dressing me down. I was a "really poor leader, and you're not going to go anywhere in the Army." Jokes on him, they haven't kicked me out yet.
COL: This is why nobody likes "cool guys." Words, words, words. You'd better do something about this, words, words, words. My penis is too small to shower with the big boys, words, words, words. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT.
I returned to the Soldiers, whom were still all in the front-leaning-rest. I screamed, "GET ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BUILDING. I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL AFTER PEOPLE SEE ME SMOKE THE FUCKING LIFE FROM YOUR BODY. NOW FUCKING RUN." They fucking scurry, and I stroll to the other side of the building. Out of sight and out of mind.
(I will use "Group" unless Hawk is the person talking. Too many useless names otherwise.)
OP: That fucking dickhead has his own fucking shower! What the fuck?
GROUP: I know right?
OP: What the fuck were you guys thinking? I would expect this from at least one of you, but I won't point elbows. (I then just fucking stare at Hawk.)
GROUP: We didn't think anyone used it. We had never seen anyone go into the room, and the room looked empty. We saw the water tank on top, and just figured we would check it out.
OP: How the fuck did you even get up there?
GROUP: You can walk to it if you exit any second floor window on our building. Well, the courtyard side.
OP: So you guys just sneak out and hang out in this guys shower water?
GROUP: Yes, but we seriously thought nobody used it. We would not have used it otherwise.
OP:You fucking dip-shits think this was just a randomly placed unused water tank? You fucking idiots just stand in this guys shower water for hours?
HAWK: No. We are not dumb Sergeant. We sit on MRE (Meal Ready to Eat) boxes.
OP: HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON?
GROUP: (LaughteGiggles) Every night!?!
OP: We have been here for five days now! NO FUCKING MORE! I will fucking kill you if I get yelled at again over this. The only thing that makes me smile is the fact that he is showering with your ball funk.
Hawk: I have some excellent news then Sergeant
OP: Really? Whats Hawk?
Hawk: (Smirk) We made a promise that, "nobody pisses in the hot tub"...
OP: This is why your mother should have swallowed you Hawk. Why the fuck would that make me happy?
Hawk: (Laughing) Because I broke that rule every night. Most nights more than once!
GROUP: What the fuck Hawk! We have been lounging in your piss? What the fuck dude!
Hawk: I know. (Smiles.) I lied to you though! Cheer up Sergeant. I peed on him for you!
For the record, Hawk did not find the hot tub. He just peed in it, a lot. I don't think any of us paid attention because they came back from wet and with towels. I merely assumed they went to the showers. I suppose I should have kept better track of time. Also, I apologize if this was not as funny as the other Hawk tales. I realized it when I reread it, but it was certainly funny being on-the-ground and witnessing it. Can't laugh at them all I suppose. Remember, next week, "Hawk Walks Home: In Iraq." I don't think it is feasibly possible to not make that one funny. Lastly, some of my stories are a result of me being in the military, but not military. Those stories and others will/are posted at FuckeryUniveristy. I am not ever going to compete with this page, but I do need a place to post other stories and have little fear they will be taken down. The mod may be a huge prick, but at least I know the guy. Man...huge prick!
Cheers!
submitted by SloppyEyeScream to MilitaryStories [link] [comments]

Hot Tub Hawk And The Pissed Off Colonel

Well! Here we are again. Everyone is sitting around this internet campfire, anxiously awaiting another Hawk story. Some of you are making S'mores. Others have crammed a stick into a hotdog and are now roasting it. I "Cope" with life and have a fat dip in. The only person I don't see is Hawk. Wait. There he is, and he keeps sticking his fingers into the fire to, "make sure it's still hot." I wonder if there is still a need to detail how mentally deficient or completely oblivious Hawk is? I strongly encourage you to read my previous stories if you have not been formally introduced to Hawk. I suspect you will continue to read anyways, so I offer you this: Hawk is the type of guy that gets into a spelling argument with his tattoo artist and walks out proud of his two-inch sized font forehead tattoo that reads "No Regerts."
We were in beautiful Iraq, a charming vacation destination for thousands of Americans. The vacation was all inclusive. The local women dressed like Pac-Man ghosts or ninjas, and countryside smelled like raw sewage and regret. Most of the locals were very hospitable, but some of the locals had a very strong desire to shout, "Praise Allah" while simultaneously trying to kill us. I am not bothered by much. Every human is entitled to their beliefs. We are also entitled to our own opinions. For example, I don't personally feel "man-dresses" and flip-flops are suitable combat attire, but who am I too judge? The only time I have an issue with people is when they are actively trying to kill me. I don't know why, but it really pisses me off. That and grape jelly.
We worked out of two different locations during this deployment. The majority of my Battalion worked out of a medium-sized Forward Operating Base (FOB), but we also operated out of a smaller FOB. We typically stayed at this other location for about ten days, and would rotate with another Platoon. The location was not horrible, but I personally hated the transient lifestyle. We lived out of our ruck-sacks, and had to find ways to occupy our time when we were not conducting raids or other missions. We didn't have the luxuries we had at "home." There were no gaming systems or large televisions. We simply had find ways to occupy ourselves.
Football was the game of choice for a couple weeks, then it got blacklisted. It had nothing to do with the ball being pigskin either. It was mostly due to poor mission analysis. Football was one of the few things we could all do and actually enjoyed, until it was too dark to play. We had a brilliant and genius idea. We fucking "own the night" with our Night Vision Goggle (NVGs), so why don't we rent it for a couple hours to finish the game? Game on Garth! We thought of everything. We drenched that infidel ball in Infrared (IR) chemlight (Glow Stick) juice. The depth perception problem was immediately evident. House took a fucking laser beam pass to the to the face. Two black eyes builds character though.
We can work through it though. His NVGs were still Fully Mission Capable (FMC), and we all realized that we needed to be a bit quicker. The fourth play from scrimmage was undoubtedly the best, and worst football play in the history of Iraq football. Fuck punting. We were going for it. It would have been easy to confuse Tony, our quarterback for Michael Vick from the shotgun. Tony was a Michael Vick with NVGs, and without the dog fighting felony. Tony evaded numerous rushers and then superbly delivered a fifty yard completion to Ryan. It was beautiful to watch, until it wasn't. NVG's are great, but they don't offer the same Field of View (FOV) your eye-nuggets offer. Ryan thought he was all alone and started a leisurely stroll to the end-zone. The he got fucking nuked from the top and bottom, in fucking reverse directions. Sure, Ryan broke a finger and required "some" stitches. Oh and they broke three sets of NVGs in one play, but damn that was a glorious fucking hit. It was first-and-ten, but our Platoon Sergeant was less than happy. Game off Wayne!
We were now bored again. There was another unit on the FOB with us, but they were not fans of us. The only real interaction we had was when their full-bird Colonel told us to, "stay the fuck away from his Soldiers." I don't know if one of the other Platoons ruined it for us, but the guy was just a complete prick to us.
We did our best to keep our reverse schedule, but it was just so boring during the evenings we were not working. The majority of us resorted to playing Spades or Echure, and others read. Hawk and a handful of others would take nightly showers and then seemed to vanish. "Knowledge is power" and I knew Hawk was utterly powerless. I knew better than to ever let that retarded bird spread his wings and fly solo. I didn't see any reason to worry though. The other people Hawk was with were far smarter than Hawk woud ever be. Furthermore, with football now off the table, there was really no way for anyone to get in trouble at this FOB.
Imagine Hawk in a cattle chute. If I put a box labeled "commonsense" on the opposite end, Hawk would never fucking find it. In a place he literally has no option but to find it, he would NOT FIND IT. EVER. However, if I had a box labeled "worst decision ever" and dropped it in the ocean, Hawk would fucking somehow stumble upon the lost city of Atlantis. I had never really got my ass chewed before I became Hawk's leader, but that trend went out the window when I inherited him.
We lived on the second floor, and my bunk was closest to the door that rotation. Thankfully too. I was woken up when I heard, "I want to talk to one of your leaders." I didn't know "who" was in trouble, but I had Hawk so I knew it was best to simply put my shoes on and assume I was in trouble by proxy. I didn't even wait to see if I would get to sit on the Green Army Weenie, I just spit in my hand and readied my o-ring for maximal insertion. It was too early for the sun to even be out, and I was already willingly walking to my execution. My how things had changed so quickly.
I walk outside and I see five Soldiers, one Hawk, and a fucking pissed of Colonel (COL).
COL: Are you their leader?
OP: I am one of them. How can I help you Sir?
COL: Do you know where I caught them?
This is where I would typically say something stupid, but this guy didn't look happy, and I didn't want to give him a reason to wake up someone who "may" have gave a shit as to why he was irate.
OP: No Sir. I don't.
COL: Above MY SHOWER?
I was now pissed. There was a large shower tent in the middle of large open courtyard. One half was male and the other was female. These fucking morons were spying on naked females? I want to kill them for listening to Hawk. Well, I assumed it was a Hawk idea. Like Hawk's brain, I was putting the cart before the horse. I assume it was Hawk, but I had questions.
OP: How in the fuck did you guys get on top the shower tent?
I was working myself into a frenzy. My brain does not operate like normal people brains. I was pretty pissed considering they violated the privacy of the beautiful ladies at the FOB, but I was actually more pissed they got on top of a fucking tent. They seemingly forgot everything about military tactics and got caught; that was the foremost reason for my anger. The spying on deployment 1's (binary thingy) was second. Considerably a far worse offense, but second at the point in time.
COL: NO. Not the shower tent. On my personal shower.
What? This guy was so special, he had a personal shower. What, he was too good to use the pallet floored showers like the rest of us? So maybe the Romanians (We think anyways) occasionally shit on the pallets and waffle-stomped the poop through the pallets, but the water pressure was phenomenal.
OP: You have a personal shower Sir, and they were on top?
COL: YES. I caught them in my water tank.
Well, back to being puzzled. I don't judge. I personally don't care if penis gazing is your hobby, but there are five of you? Why don't you just unleash your hogs and stare at each others? Anyways, how in the fuck did they all fit into the water tank? What the fuck did they do when they got inside? My god, my brain was running wild with unsightly pictures.
OP: My apologies Sir, but how did they all fit into your water tank?
COL: Come with my Sergeant; so you understand what I am talking about.
OP: You mother fuckers can wait for me in, the front-leaning-rest (Push-up position).
I still wasn't certain I entirely cared, but I thought this would may demonstrate that I showed concern about his fucking one-person shower. COL Prick then lead me around the side of the building and showed me his water tank. It was fucking huge. It was one of the typical hard plastic tanks, but the entire top had been cut off. God knows why, not like it was ever dusty in Iraq, but the top was no-more. It all made sense now. They weren't gay; they were chilling in a makeshift hot tub! Well, the gayness thing is up in the air, but I guess they were too loud while he was showering!?! I apologized profusely, but COL Prick had me locked up at the position of attention for at least ten minutes just dressing me down. I was a "really poor leader, and you're not going to go anywhere in the Army." Jokes on him, they haven't kicked me out yet.
COL: This is why nobody likes "cool guys." Words, words, words. You'd better do something about this, words, words, words. My penis is too small to shower with the big boys, words, words, words. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT.
I returned to the Soldiers, whom were still all in the front-leaning-rest. I screamed, "GET ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BUILDING. I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL AFTER PEOPLE SEE ME SMOKE THE FUCKING LIFE FROM YOUR BODY. NOW FUCKING RUN." They fucking scurry, and I stroll to the other side of the building. Out of sight and out of mind.
(I will use "Group" unless Hawk is the person talking. Too many useless names otherwise.)
OP: That fucking dickhead has his own fucking shower! What the fuck?
GROUP: I know right?
OP: What the fuck were you guys thinking? I would expect this from at least one of you, but I won't point elbows. (I then just fucking stare at Hawk.)
GROUP: We didn't think anyone used it. We had never seen anyone go into the room, and the room looked empty. We saw the water tank on top, and just figured we would check it out.
OP: How the fuck did you even get up there?
GROUP: You can walk to it if you exit any second floor window on our building. Well, the courtyard side.
OP: So you guys just sneak out and hang out in this guys shower water?
GROUP: Yes, but we seriously thought nobody used it. We would not have used it otherwise.
OP:You fucking dip-shits think this was just a randomly placed unused water tank? You fucking idiots just stand in this guys shower water for hours?
HAWK: No. We are not dumb Sergeant. We sit on MRE (Meal Ready to Eat) boxes.
OP: HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON?
GROUP: (LaughteGiggles) Every night!?!
OP: We have been here for five days now! NO FUCKING MORE! I will fucking kill you if I get yelled at again over this. The only thing that makes me smile is the fact that he is showering with your ball funk.
Hawk: I have some excellent news then Sergeant
OP: Really? Whats Hawk?
Hawk: (Smirk) We made a promise that, "nobody pisses in the hot tub"...
OP: This is why your mother should have swallowed you Hawk. Why the fuck would that make me happy?
Hawk: (Laughing) Because I broke that rule every night. Most nights more than once!
GROUP: What the fuck Hawk! We have been lounging in your piss? What the fuck dude!
Hawk: I know. (Smiles.) I lied to you though! Cheer up Sergeant. I peed on him for you!
For the record, Hawk did not find the hot tub. He just peed in it, a lot. I don't think any of us paid attention because they came back from wet and with towels. I merely assumed they went to the showers. I suppose I should have kept better track of time. Also, I apologize if this was not as funny as the other Hawk tales. I realized it when I reread it, but it was certainly funny being on-the-ground and witnessing it. Can't laugh at them all I suppose. Remember, next week, "Hawk Walks Home: In Iraq." I don't think it is feasibly possible to not make that one funny. Lastly, some of my stories are a result of me being in the military, but not military. Those stories and others will/are posted at FuckeryUniveristy. I am not ever going to compete with this page, but I do need a place to post other stories and have little fear they will be taken down. The mod may be a huge prick, but at least I know the guy. Man...huge prick!
Cheers!
submitted by SloppyEyeScream to FuckeryUniveristy [link] [comments]

Is it X or Y they will choose at the end? (Final Exhibition speculation)

There is a series of posters from the Final Exhibition that show the characters having to choose between two binary options in the end. One that is quite interesting is Mikasa's poster
"Will it be tears or a smile that she will show at the end?"
What's interesting about it is we already know the answer - she will show both. You can see it in the shard from Eren's future memories in ch.130, where she is both smiling and shedding a tear. (For comparison, mysterious future!Mikasa from ch.1 was not crying, or at least we couldn't see the tears, so it's something Isayama added specifically for 130 memory shard). The "see you later" scene probably also fits the criteria for "at the end", since whether Mikasa lives or not, this memory will likely be the last Eren sees of her.
Since Mikasa ends up fulfilling both of her binary options and not just one, I won't be surprised if the other characters with the same posters combine both outcomes too.
Armin: "Is it truth or friendship that he has chosen to believe in?" Armin before this chapter has definitely chosen to believe in friendship over truth. In 118 he remembers Eren's words at the ocean and figures out what he is planning to do, but dismisses all the warning signs because he wants to believe in his bff Ereh, and persuades the rest of the 104th into helping him, which leads to Eren surviving the Marleyan assault (they saved his ass like 3 times in that battle) and unleashing the Rumbling. Basically, Armin's belief in the power of friendship led to the global titan apocalypse. Isn't that beautiful?
Even after Eren announces his genocidal intent, Armin keeps on believing that he can talk him out of it. He gets shot in the mouth for his talking attempts at the port, Annie accuses him of trying to run away from conflict, and finally, Eren (or at least, his nightmare child version) announces that he will not stop and that they will have to fight to the death (muahaha). Does that mean Armin will choose "truth" this time, the truth being that Eren is completely unreachable and their friendship means nothing anymore? Will he thus fulfil both "truth" and "friendship" requirements, having chosen friendship in the first half of the arc, and truth in the latter?
When Annie accuses Armin of trying to avoid conflict, she gets up to get away from him, but he grabs her hand and tells her to stay, calling back to his and Eren's dream of exploring the outside world. This scene also happens right after Eren (the cheerful psycho kid variety Eren, not the empty-eyed psycho kid one) inadvertently reaches out to Armin through PATHS. If Armin could reach an enemy like Annie, and if Eren decided to reach out to him, could we still have one last attempt from Armin to reach Eren? Or is the bad collective TnJ attempt from last chapter the last one? Could Armin still believe in some sort of friendship at the end, and realize some truth alongside that? Especially since Eren has stated his supposed goal of saving his nakama through genocide multiple times, and now he seemingly goes back on it.
I also have some speculation on FORESHADOWING from serumbowl era: these two wonderful pages! Don't they look like delicious foreshadowing? Basically, Mikasa's focus is on giving up on her loved one in the end, Eren's focus is on not being able to throw away what's important to him (and also never giving up and believing he is always right, like a child). Armin mostly reacts to this, since he didn't do anything in Serumbowl aside from being a well-done steak and chomping on Boruto, but what he did do before he went to commit suicide by Bort was wake up an unconscious Eren by stabbing through his titan's nape (just like in Trost) and talk about their shared dreams. Hmm. It's almost like current situation has some similar set up.
What I am guessing is Armin will have one last friendship power moment and try to reach sleepy Eren head through his titan, and maybe some truth will be achieved as a result I dunno. Or maybe he will just nuke him and be done with it.
Eren: "Was is justice or liberty that he sacrificed?"
Yeah I am not going to debate whether Eren's jolly kid-trampling ride is "just" or not because I am not interested, but I'd say the story - and Eren himself - are framing it as unjust (no, King Fritz's suicidal pacifism, sacrificing Hisu's kids for the 50y plan, or Zeke's race-wide euthanasia are not justice either, neither of those are) with Eren calling himself worse that Reiner (and then, the same as Reiner) and all that. I'd say this sequence shows his supposed choice most clearly: happy kid Eren is soaring in the clouds screaming about F R E E D O M while his colossal army indiscriminately flattens thousands upon thousands of civilians underfoot. Clearly, he has chosen to sacrifice justice over liberty. Or did he?
Now, Eren's question is not what he has chosen to act upon, but what he chose to sacrifice. Justice or liberty. Since I am working off an idea that both will be true, that means he will sacrifice both of them. His actions are unjust, but neither is he free.
I mean, obviously. He is fulfilling a self-imposed timeloop, saying how the future can't be changed and he has no choice, as his Titan is hanging on puppet strings while he pretends to be an ignorant kid and at this point has his eyes shadowed ala slavemir in paths. Question is, what is he slave to? The overall circumstances? His own nature? Going back to FORESHADOWING, does he know he is not free, or does he believe he is in the right? And will he never be able to throw away what's most important to him (whatever this is?)
Other character questions:
Levi: "Is it hope or despair that his strength comes from?"
Erwin: "Was it dreams or duties he was protecting to the end?"
I can speculate on them too, but I think you can make the "both are true" answer for these two pretty easily.
submitted by SulkySpacebat to titanfolk [link] [comments]

Crypto.com Chain Introduces Croeseid Testnet

Crypto.com Chain Introduces Croeseid Testnet
New Cosmos-based Testnet Lays Foundation for De-Fi Roadmap

https://i.redd.it/6gxluz1bg0u51.gif
Crypto.com Chain released the first version of its new testnet named Croeseid, featuring a new codebase based on the Cosmos SDK today, 19 October 2020. The name “Croeseid” is derived from the world’s first gold and silver bimetallic coin that had a standardized purity, an invention which unleashed the rapid diffusion of coinage throughout the ancient world. This resonates with Crypto.com’s mission: to accelerate the world's transition to cryptocurrency, powered by Crypto.com Chain. The change in architecture also lays a strong foundation for future support of our decentralized finance (DeFi) roadmap.
Crypto.com Chain has updated to the new testnet to bring about more benefits, powered by the Cosmos SDK:
  1. For developers: make deployment easier and enable more choices, such as: a) Multi-platform support (e.g., Windows, Mac, Linux) b) Single binary for Crypto.com Chain node c) More options for cloud providers (e.g., Intel SGX support now optional)
  2. For partners: enable more convenient integration;
  3. For users: the ability to support more features (such as delegation of staking and governance):
  4. For the DeFi ecosystem: better support for DeFi use cases, e.g., the IBC (Inter-Blockchain Communication) protocol module could support cross-chain asset transfers and communications.
The Croeseid testnet continues to adopt Tendermint Core as its consensus engine. Tendermint is one of the most mature Byzantine-fault tolerant (BFT) consensus engines for building proof-of-stake systems. For more details on why Tendermint was chosen, please refer to Crypto.com Chain Dev Update #1.
The Croeseid testnet codebase is released on Github here written in the Go programming language. Until mainnet launch, the Croeseid testnet will be the new and only official version of Crypto.com Chain going forward. The Crypto.com Chain team always welcome the community to review and provide suggestions to the design.
An earlier testnet released by Crypto.com, Thaler testnet, will continue to be updated by the Crypto.com team, but will take the role of an experimental codebase to test certain features. Codebase and resources related to Thaler can be viewed on Github under the folder “crypto-com/thaler” here.
Since the initial launch of the testnet in 2019 Q3, Crypto.com Chain has received massive support from the community and industry partners. Today, 50 validators have joined Chain and processed 350K+ transactions in total. We plan to keep this strong momentum as we launch the Croeseid testnet and invite more partners to join our ecosystem to host validators on our chain. To indicate your interest, please complete this form.
submitted by BryanM_Crypto to Crypto_com [link] [comments]

THE SEARCH FOR THE GREATEST SWITCH SHMUP: EPISODE 28 – Raiden V: Director’s Cut

Before I begin, I just want to remind everyone that all of my reviews can be found at my site: www.azormx.com. I tried to keep it as minimalist as possible, and it doesn't have any add or any other intrusive elements, so the content is king. Do check it out, as reviews are usually live there before I publish them elsewhere. Any way, on to the review!

The shmup genre hasn’t been a mainstream genre in a long time. To be honest, I don’t think it ever was, even during the arcade days. While we certainly don’t have a shortage of shmups, let alone new release, they usually come from smaller teams. Indies have taken it upon themselves to become a guiding light for all of us. Their creations have been nothing short of amazing! However, we don’t really have anything we could call a “AAA” shmup. We do seem to have the next closest thing: Raiden.
Developer: Moss Co.
Platform: Nintendo Switch
Release date: Jul 25, 2019
Price: $29.99
Tate: Unfortunately… no. This really needed to have TATE
Raiden V: Director’s Cut is a vertical shmup set in a fictional but real world. It claims to be the original bullet-hell, and after playing it extensively I gotta say that I agree. Raiden V features some intense air combat, coupled with giant bosses and some jaw-dropping transitions between areas.

THE GREAT INTRO CHECKLIST

Right out of the gate, what caught my attention was the intro. The best way I can put this is that it has everything great about shmups in a short video. It has a great track, it has giant enemies, it has ships and it even has pieces of lore I do not understand! Simply amazing!
Most importantly, it is a very accurate portrayal as to what you should expect from the game. Unlike other shmups, Raiden goes all out in the presentation department, with the story taking a mayor role. Another way I can put this, is that it certainly feels like a considerable effort was placed in every element of the game. Raiden V features a level of polish that very few shmups can claim to have.

WELCOME TO THE CUSTOMIZATION STATION

One of Raiden’s strength is the amount of customization you have available for your ship. At the beginning of the game, you can choose between one of 3 different ships: Azuma, Spirit of Dragon and Moulin Rouge. Each of these ships has different stats in terms of attack, defense and speed. They also have their own sub-shot which is always firing along with your main cannon.
On top of selecting a ship, you can arm yourself with 3 out of 9 different weapons. Those 9 weapons are grouped into 3 categories: Vulcan, Laser and Plasma. You can pick, or rather you must pick 1 for each category. The result is a combat style that is unique to you.
During your play throughs, you will encounter several power-up orbs. These orbs will power up each of your weapons up to 10 times! Each of these orbs can be either red, blue or purple depending on the weapon it powers up. The orbs cycle the colors, with an outer dot indicating a timer until it changes colors. This allows you to control which weapon you want to power up, giving you the flexibility to pick your own style or choose a weapon for the occasion.
The best part is that absolutely no power-ups are lost upon death! This means that you are free to retry to your heart's content and play at your own pace. Raiden won't punish you or set you up for failure with an unrecoverable situation.
I didn’t put too much attention into weapon selection at first. I figured it wouldn’t be too relevant, as I would probably just play the entire game with a single weapon, but the advanced scoring mechanics and the rank system were quick to make me second guess my decision.

ACE PILOT

At the core of Raiden V, there are 2 main systems to be aware of: your rank and your flash level. Both of them measure your combat capabilities, although in different ways. Your flash point gauge is a score multiplier that tracks how fast you defeat your enemies. By defeating enemies as soon as possible after spawning, you can earn higher multipliers to increase your flash gauge. By having quick kills, you can raise it to higher levels to increase your score. Your rank, on the other hand, only concerns itself with how many enemies you’ve defeated.
Your rank doubles as the deciding factor of which path you will be taking. Raiden features branching paths with an A, B, C or S version of each stage. Depending on your total destruction rate, you will either move up or down in rank after a stage. While I do not know the exact numbers, I believe having more than 98% destruction rate will increase your rank, 90 – 98% will keep it as is and <90% should decrease your rank. S rank stages are presumably harder than A/B/C stages, with C being the lowest.
Apart from having a higher score and challenging yourself with the difficulty, the importance of S rank is getting the true ending. In order to truly watch the ending of the game, you need to reach the final stage on S rank using a single credit. You also need to power up your 3 weapons to level 10. Once you meet those conditions, you will be able to challenge the final boss. Alternatively, you could just fulfill the level 10 weapons condition to fight the true final boss.

THE BEST CHEERLEADER

A new addition to Raiden V is the cheer system. By accomplishing certain in-game milestones like a certain number of enemies destroyed, you will get an achievement. These achievements are broadcasted to any players connected to the leaderboards. They can then “cheer” on your achievement to increase your cheer gauge. This goes both ways, as you can also cheer the achievements of your fellow Raiden players.
Once the cheer gauge is full, you can unleash it to clear the screen and gain a drastically stronger sub-shot. Think of it as a devastating bomb, only more devastating and easier to fill. It clears screens and decimates even the bosses.
Perhaps many people won’t think too much of it, but I found it really interesting to know that there’s someone on the other side celebrating my achievements. Likewise, there were times where I left my game on pause to do other stuff, but held on to my controller to provide support for my comrades.

SWIFT DESTRUCTION

Everything I’ve mentioned before plays out in the general strategy of the game. Assuming you want to get the best results, you need to know where to hit and how to hit hard. For the untrained eye, most shmups just look like games where you fire away with complete disregard and hope the enemy dies. This is definitely not the case in Raiden.
In order to succeed, you must be able to find your rhythm and read the stage. Learn the enemy formations and strategize the quickest kills. Be there before the enemy arrives and take them down before they realize what hit them. If you want to face the true final boss, then you must also learn to juggle your weapons and find the moments to upgrade them. Maxing a weapon and then switching is a recipe for disaster, as you don’t want to be on the later stages with a level one weapon and risk your flash level or destruction rate. With so many weapons and ship types, your strategy to succeed will be unique to you!

LORE GALORE

One of the main selling points, at least per the game itself, is the story. Raiden V features an extensive story that is fully voiced and occurs as you play the game. This story elements come as the prologue and epilogue scenes, as well as all the events happening mid stage.
As you fly your way to the levels, characters will be advancing the story by having conversations and narrating the current events. The dialogue is available on one of the gadgets located on the right side of the screen. You can read anything you might have missed and even pause to read the on-screen log of events (up to a certain number of events, as the log scrolls to open way for new text).
As for my opinion of the story, I have absolutely no idea of what happened during the game. I played my fair share of runs, but I found it next to impossible to focus on the dialogue while trying my hardest to survive. The voice acting would have been my saving grace, but I found the sound mixing to be the opposite of ideal for listening to dialogue. I even tried lowering the sound effects and BGM to see if I could focus on dialogue to no avail.
The text is also incredibly small when playing on docked mode. It gets even worse when playing handheld.

THE WORST CHEERLEADER

Out of all the voices, Eshiria’s was the one who got on my nerves the most at the beginning. Other than having her role as navigator on the plot, she also critiques your gameplay. In-between stage scenes, she will provide commentary describing your gameplay. She will be quick to point out if you did well, but also if you did poorly. On my early runs, when I was still learning, it would tilt me to listen to her complaining to me about stats I did not understand.
And perhaps, a huge part of my problems was a lack of understanding of the game mechanics. I listened to her complain about my destruction rate without knowing it was about my rank. She also complained about destruction speed without me knowing it was about the flash point.
The problem is that the game never bothered explaining any of its mechanics to me. I really looked around for some sort of tutorial to no avail. I had to resort to 3rd party resources. While that isn’t uncommon, I really don’t like games with obscure mechanics that can’t be discerned in-game.
Once I got better and consistently reach the S levels, I finally started to value her advice. Of course, I wouldn’t count on everyone reaching the same enlightenment as I did. In my opinion, her comments would more often than not add insult to injury. Once again, it’s not really the commentary, it’s the fact that none of what she said made practical sense until I started digging on the wiki.

GADGETS AND THE SCREEN REAL ESTATE

Perhaps the worst omission from Raiden V is the lack of a TATE mode. Vertical shooters don’t really have an excuse to do this, with the existence of add-ons like the flip grip or rotating monitors. Instead, Raiden decided to make the most out of the free space and add several gadgets.
In standard fashion, these gadgets will keep your stats like score, flash level, the dialogue and even hi-score statistics. Your left gadget can even be cycled between the score chart and cheer notification, in-game tips and global statistics. Out of those, the tips are definitely the winners. They do give some important advice, such as staying on top of the guns of the first boss to avoid damage.

NOT A FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD

Every stage is divided into smaller scenes. These scenes serve as a way to catch your breath and tally your score. There’s even a nifty “restart scene” option that allows you to replay a scene. Choosing to restart will deny you the option to upload your score to the leaderboard, but serves as a great way to practice or even “fix” a run to so can get to the true ending.
Every once in a while, the action will pan out and open the way to a bigger stage, with you looking smaller in comparison. I admire the grandioseness of the resulting scenes, but they were also quite impractical. Think about your weapons, the destruction rate and the flash gauge. An extended stage means longer travel distances from side to side. Having a bigger stage means you move slower, which reduces the pacing of the game to a crawl. Reaching enemies quickly becomes a struggle. Worst yet, I’ve counted times where it took me whopping 5 seconds to go from side to side of the stage.

THE OG BULLET HELL

Despite all the fun of blasting enemies quickly to gain flash levels, I gotta say that I found the combat, specifically the bullets, to be lacking in grace. For a game that’s the original bullet hell, most enemy volleys feel like bullet showers. There’s no finesse in them, just a bunch of bullets moving towards you. Dodging them isn’t fun, it’s survival. The problem only gets worse in higher difficulties where the bullets just go faster.
Not all patterns are as bad though. While the vast majority will be just a bunch on increasingly faster bullets thrown at you, some exceptional patterns will show from time to time. As a result, fights tend to be very hit or miss, with both hits and misses being on their respective extremes.
What certainly doesn’t help is that the bullets are very hard to see. As pretty as the backgrounds might be, they are very busy and the quick motion makes them into a blur. Bullets don’t have their characteristic outlines or color palettes to become distinguishable. Some even blend with your own vulcan. The result is a lot of cheap kills caused by intentional obfuscation. It this was their intention, then perhaps I’m being too harsh, but you know visibility is usually one of my pet peeves in shmups.

REPLAYABILITY AND LONGEVITY

As far as game length goes, I consider Raiden V to be one of the longer ones. I was surprised after my first run of the game, as it took me 50+ minutes to complete the campaign. Usually, my baseline for shmups is around half an hour, which made this one almost twice as long. While I’m not fond of longer campaigns, I know a lot of people would certainly be glad to know there is plenty of content.
Of course, playing through the campaign isn’t enough to view the entire game. If you recall, most stages have 4 versions of themselves. Those versions are separated by the ranks: S/A/B/C. This means you would need at least 4 runs to see everything the game has to offer. There’s also 6 different endings to uncover.
Also new to the Director’s Cut edition are 2 bonus levels. These level are slightly different from your typical levels. The bonus missions will challenge you to fight a new boss ir oder to obtain medals. Dealing damage will detach the medals from the boss, allowing you to catch them. Gather enough medals and you will advance to the next phase. Higher medals mean higher ranking. Taking damage will take medals away from you, so surviving continues to be a priority.
Lastly, there is a new boss mission mode that allow you to play “boss rush” missions. These missions have certain conditions, like using a specific weapon or fighting at a specific HP level. The targets are usually 1-3 bosses. Boss mission is a very fun arcadey mode for those who enjoyed the boss fights and want more of them.

SOUND EXCELLENCE

If there’s a factor that merits my highest praise is the sound department. Simply put, the OST is fantastic. The track length syncs perfectly with the stages, and it always fits the mood. I just couldn’t get enough of the OST, and listening to it while writing this review was the recipe for a perfect Sunday! I also got some good coffee that would make the captain proud.
For all the praise the music gets from me, it still is dragged down by the terrible sound mixing. Similarly to the voice acting, I tried to mess with the sound settings to increase the volume and reduce the sound effects, but it still wasn’t enough. The tracks were great but I struggled to listen to them amidst all the explosions. The calm moments were great, as they let me listen to the songs in peace.

LAST WORDS

Raiden is a master class in shmup design for the wrong reasons. Its high points perfectly illustrate how shmups should look and feel. The low points also show what you should NOT do when creating a shmup game. Despite all of this, it all comes down to how fun a game is.
Raiden V is a very fun game. It isn’t different, but it’s certainly very polished. I delivers some levels of quality that are notably absent in the majority of the games. As a concept, I feel like it serves as an example of how current gen shmups should be. The execution fell flat in some regards, but as a whole I was satisfied with the time I spent with the game. It does come with a hefty price tag, so my advice is to check this game out when you find a decent sale. I got mine at -70%.

THE RANKING SO FAR:

  1. Ikaruga
  2. Psyvariar Delta
  3. Darius Cozmic Collection Arcade
  4. Devil Engine
  5. Rolling Gunner
  6. Blazing Star
  7. Jamestown+
  8. Raiden V: Director’s Cut
  9. Darius Cozmic Collection Console
  10. Tengai
  11. Steredenn: Binary Stars
  12. Stardust Galaxy Warriors: Stellar Climax
  13. Sky Force: Reloaded
  14. Strikers 1945
  15. Black Paradox
  16. R-Type Dimensions EX
  17. Sine Mora EX
  18. Shikhondo – Soul Eater
  19. Ghost Blade HD
  20. AngerForce: Reloaded
  21. Aero Fighters 2 (ACA Neogeo)
  22. Q-YO Blaster
  23. Lightening Force: Quest for the darkstar (Sega Ages)
  24. Pawarumi
  25. Red Death
  26. Task Force Kampas
  27. Switch ‘N’ Shoot
  28. Last Resort (ACA Neogeo)
submitted by AzorMX to u/AzorMX [link] [comments]

DEFCON 1, They're Here.

[first] \ [prev]
“Ah, General Atkins, what an unexpected surprise.”
“The pleasure is all mine, Mr. President. I am afraid this is not just a friendly visit, but I am here to advise you to move the nation into DEFCON 1,” the General’s eyes looked sunken, the poor soul looked like he had been up all night, “I’ve arranged a meeting with some of our friends over at NASA as well as NORAD. This is a highly unusual situation, but it is of the upmost importance.”
“Well it better be, do I need pants?” the General hadn’t even noticed that the President was still in his, let’s say, nightly attire. “Sir, whatever you feel comfortable in will work,” Atkins gestured down the hall.
The pair made their way down the hall, to the right, then a left, and came upon a rather boring looking door. Except, it was nothing more than a ruse for what lay beneath it. This particular door can only be opened with a secret numerical combination, alongside a retinal scan, thermal scan, and a handprint. This was the President’s Official Wartime Emergency Response Room, or P.O.W.E.R.R. for short. This little bad boy could survive the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs, as well as feed and house a small family of six for up to four years. This is also the room that the President must remain in until DEFCON 1 is lifted.
“So aliens? You’re telling me we are talking about real life aliens?” the President almost wanted to laugh at the experts on the screen. He was imagining little green goblins from Mars, the kind he used to see on the television as a child.
“Um, yes?” the head of NASA sounding almost like he was still trying to convince himself of what was happening, “we have detected what appears to be a fleet of sixty ships. If we were to compare them to our own class of space fleet, approximately twenty of them are larger than our Titan class combat ready warships, twenty of them appear to be supply ships, and the last twenty seem to be non-combatant ships,” the director explained. “However, these are just our best guesses, for all we know they’re all warships ready to glass the surface of the planet.”
“Our orbital defense system, is it up and running?” interjected Atkins.
“It is, the accelerators are at full power as we speak, but we do not believe it might be the best course of action,” replied Colonel Grimes. Colonel Grimes was most likely to be the pacifist of the bunch, even though he was high up in the Space Force, as well as on the Board of Directors at NORAD.
This answer didn’t satisfy Atkins, “If these green little Martians are ready to carpet bomb the people of this planet with nuclear hellfire, why shouldn’t we be ready to annihilate their entire fleet?”
“Well, I’m not sure the people would want us to do that, we should probably take the diplomatic approach as outlined in the First Contact Protocol. These are the first beings who are evidence of other intelligent life forms, and so far they haven’t made any outward hostile threats to the safety of the nation as a whole,” added the Colonel, “as well, I’m not too sure the people would want us to approach this historic moment with unleashing the Sun on our first visitors. Adopting a ‘peace was never an option’ mentality could potentially put us in a war with an unknown enemy with unknown capabilities. Pardon my French here, but maybe we shouldn’t glass those damn ‘commie’ ETs.”
’Well, this is most definitely going to go great,’ thought the President to himself, listening to the two high ranking military officials before him bicker.
[UPLINK ENGAGED]
[TRANSMISSION BEGIN]
UNIVERSAL TRANSLATOR V4.1.6.5
SOURCE LANGUAGE: JAAKAN
TRANSLATED LANGUAGE: TERRAN ‘ENGLISH’
TRANSCRIPT:
We have come to make contact with you. We come in peace, and we do not bear any hostile intent to your people. But be warned, we have weaponry on hand that is beyond anything you can comprehend. Any military action against us will guarantee nothing but a swift end to your species. But, do not allow the threat of intimidation to hinder galactic diplomacy. We are broadcasting this message to what we have identified as the different leaders of your people. We are attempting to decipher as many of your languages as possible, and currently this message is being broadcast in: Spanish, French, Russian, Mandarin, and Hindi.
We have left this frequency and channel open to allow you to communicate with us in any of the listed languages above, as well as binary. We know you have questions, as this must be the most jarring of experiences; finding out about higher beings within the universe.
We shall not feel any offence, should you start considering us ‘Gods’ or ‘Higher Deities,’ we understand that your cultures are heavily based upon religious and spiritual beliefs. After all, we did help create you.
Hoping to hear from you soon.
[TRANSMISSION END]
[UPLINK CLOSED]
submitted by shamair28 to HFY [link] [comments]

[Review] Ranking all the Switch shmups Ep25 - Q-YO Blaster

There was a time when I believed that shmups could only feature ships. Then games like Parodius came to challenge that belief. If an Octopus can be the player, then anything is possible. And don’t get me started on Cho Aniki…
When it comes to unusual characters for a shmup, it’s always a coin toss. They could either be the most fun you’ve had in a while or end up being a disappointment. Time for me to toss this coin!
Publisher: Forever entertainment
Platform: Nintendo Switch
Release date: Jun 27, 2019
Price: $9.99
Tate: You can, but you might need to tilt your head
Q-YO Blaster is by far the strangest 2D horizontal shmup I’ve reviewed for this ranking list. The gameplay and mechanics aren’t anything particularly odd, but there’s something about the presentation and the lore which is legitimately fascinating. For some reason it feels like a game developed by someone out of this world who learned about our culture through animated movies.

SATURDAY MORNING SHMUP

One of the aspects that tipped me over the edge when deciding what to review was the art style. Keeping up with the animation vibe, Q-YO Blaster sports an old school cartoon art style. Enemies will be colorful creatures with quirky details such as baseball caps, big eyes or even Mickey Mouse styled gloves. Their animations are equally as comical whether it is their attack animation of their death animation.
Of course, cartoony can be used to describe maybe half of the style. The other half is probably more akin to a sci-fi coat of paint. Along the many bugs and animals, there’s also a great deal of robots, monsters, heavy weaponry and even blood running rampant (or maybe it’s oil?). It does makes sense considering the bugs came from space, and it definitely adds a touch of mystery when navigating through the stages of Q-YO Blaster.

EVERYONE IS HERE!

My original expectation of the game was to have a few pilots including the Q-YO, floating dog head from the screenshots and doggy airplane. Little did I know that Q-YO Blaster has more pilots than I have fingers in both of my hands.
Pilots are arranged into 3 different teams. Each pilot has different stats which include damage, speed and fire. The teams can have +damage, +endurance or a mixture of both. Fortunately, despite the outrageous pilot designs and sprites, their hitboxes are all the same. After picking your pilot, you can pick one of 7 different special weapons to round out your style. From whichever angle you want to watch it, Q-YO Blaster offers a crazy amount of customization options.
The defining feature of each team is their assistant. Assistant are powerful screen-wide effects that trigger once you fill the assistant gauge. The gauge can be filled by continuously shooting and defeating enemies. Once filled, you can hold the fire button to unleash its effect. The effects are a screen explosion that clears bullets, a temporary shield or a 360 barrage of missiles.

BUILDING YOUR OFFENSE

With all of the previous elements combined, you can play as one of 112 possible combinations of team, pilot and special weapons.
In terms of weapons at your disposal, you have 3: your basic shot, your special weapon and your assistant. Your basic shot is an infinite gun that shoots bullets straight ahead with some degree of spread. The first shot is always straight, so you can opt for manual rapid fire to keep a straight line of fire. Alternatively, you can hold the button and just auto-fire.
Occasionally, you’ll find power-up weapons flying around the stage. This power-ups will grant you a limited weapon when collected. These extra weapons are considerably faster than your basic shot at the cost of having limited ammo. They also have a unique effect on their very first shot, once more giving you a choice between manually shooting or going with the auto-fire.

ALSO BUILD YOUR DEFENSE

One defensive tool you have at your disposal is the pulse. Pulse clears every bullet on screen and turns them into gems. When collected, this gems will increase the level of your special weapon gauge. This special weapon will be whatever you picked on the character select, and has 3 different levels of strength depending on how many gems you have collected. It also comes with some slight invulnerability so you can use it to get out of sticky situations.
The caveat of pulse is that you can only carry 3 stocks, and it is only refilled by collecting extra pulse power-ups. I have mixed feelings about this limitation, as I feel it plays an integral part of your offensive game plan. Its hard limit prevents any smart usage other than just a get-out-of-jail card. I would have loved if it had a gauge like the assistant, as that would have created a balance between building pulse and shooting your special.

LITTLE ADVENTURES

Every stage carries a sort of familiar scenery. I like to think of it as Toy Story levels. Considering the characters are Q-YOs and bugs, it makes sense for the scenery to be a relatively small scale such as houses or gardens. I find them to be very charming, or it might be just my nostalgia kicking in because I grew up with Toy Story. Nonetheless, I really dig the stages.
At the end of each stage, there’s a very comical boss waiting for you. These bosses represent whichever vibe you got from the level. For example, the boss of the garden level is none other than Queen Bee herself. Bosses turn the action up to 11 featuring huge bullet patterns and significantly more aggressive tactics. My one complaint about the bosses is that they feel a lot like a flow chart. They have a couple of attacks and will cycle through them in the same order all the time. Assuming you can dodge them, it’s only a matter of repeating the same moves over and over until the boss goes down. This is even worse on the harder difficulties when the bosses have much more HP.
The most interesting aspects of the stages are the end rewards. Similar to many rogue-lite games, clearing a stage will let you choose a perk for the rest of your adventure. The perks are always the same, but include upgrades such as increased speed, faster shots or even 1ups.

STORY TIME!

Despite being a shmup, I really recommend paying attention to the story! It really is something else! I don’t think it actually makes much sense, but there’s something about the way it’s told that crashes my brain. It does have some powerful moments as well! Including that one stage with the sad music and the rain. I don’t want to spoil it, but it really hit me hard.
I didn’t delve too much into game modes, but there’s basically classic and arcade. Classic is your base mode with the entire story and 3 selectable difficulties. If you don’t want to go through the story every time (even though it is skippable), then arcade mode is for you. Arcade mode features 0 cutscenes, so it’s all fun and games. Arcade mode is also much harder, but has 99 continues.

HARDER ISN’T ALWAYS BETTER

I have to make one of my classic parenthesis to talk about difficulty. Being honest, I think the expert difficulty and to some extent arcade are pretty terrible. The reason is because of the way the game is balanced as a result of them. Harder difficulties feature faster bullets and more complex patterns, but also feature increased vitality for the enemies. The increased lethality of the enemies makes for a hearty challenge, but all good is wiped out by the tedium of enemy endurance.
What I found out was that enemies are very durable in the harder difficulties. Rather than creating a fun challenge, it makes it incredibly hard to destroy enemies. Most enemies feel like sponges that just refuse to die unless you have a special weapon. Some enemies feel outright impossible to kill before they leave the screen, an issue which hurts a lot when it comes to homing projectiles that need to be destroyed. Fun and dynamic dog fights become grindy situations where you focus on a single ship and fail to destroy it while having others flood the screen. I really think harder difficulties would have been better without the added HP on enemies but retaining the faster bullets and harder patterns.

SLOW AND STEADY DOESN’T WIN THE RACE

While on the topic of hard difficulties, the homing bullets are another culprit behind the reason the difficulty isn’t fun. I’ve never been a fan of homing attacks as they feel cheap, but it feels like it wasn’t play tested because some slower ships can’t actually avoid a homing shot without the speed upgrade. To be fair, no one shoots homing bullets on stage 1, so taking speed is utmost priority.
One thing I do like about speed is that most boss patterns allow you to dodge at high speed. You can’t slow your speed, so it’s nice that there isn’t finesse required to survive some waves.

A LITTLE BIT MORE TIME IN THE OVEN

If I was on a game show about quick words and someone mentioned “Q-YO Blaster”, my response would be “rough”. While some aspects of the game are really cool, there are other where it feels a little bit incomplete. Some enemies don’t match the visual quality of others such as Major Tomm. The UI and menus also seem to come from a prototype version.
There’s also a sort of bug where if you die and use a credit, the game immediately pauses. Not a big deal, but it feels out of place. The customization screen is also all sorts of blurry. You can’t remap controls either, which is a shame considering the shoulder buttons would really come in handy.
Most of these issues aren’t a big deal by themselves, but they taint the final product by making it feel a little like shovelware. The game is really fun though, so it is sad to think about having it fall under that umbrella.

FINAL WORDS

So the mandatory question is, is it fun? It definitely is! With its bizarre and unsettling vibe, Q-YO Blaster is still tons of fun to play. While there is certainly a lot of room for improvement, Q-YO Blaster is still a solid choice for a shmup if you are fan of the cartoon style, of the horizontal shmup format or just a fan of little critters in general.
THE RANKING SO FAR:
  1. Ikaruga
  2. Psyvariar Delta
  3. Devil Engine
  4. Rolling Gunner
  5. Blazing Star
  6. Jamestown+
  7. Tengai
  8. Steredenn: Binary Stars
  9. Stardust Galaxy Warriors: Stellar Climax
  10. Sky Force: Reloaded
  11. Strikers 1945
  12. Black Paradox
  13. R-Type Dimensions EX
  14. Sine Mora EX
  15. Shikhondo – Soul Eater
  16. Ghost Blade HD
  17. AngerForce: Reloaded
  18. Aero Fighters 2 (ACA Neogeo)
  19. Q-YO Blaster
  20. Lightening Force: Quest for the darkstar (Sega Ages)
  21. Pawarumi
  22. Red Death
  23. Task Force Kampas
  24. Switch ‘N’ Shoot
  25. Last Resort (ACA Neogeo)
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First Contact - Part Twenty-Three

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The Devastator class Precursor machine was the size of a large metropolis. Full of ground combat machines, air superiority machines, mining and reclamation machines that could move under their own power and were festooned with a thousand weapons. It was over a hundred million years old and had exterminated life on planets with its massive guns, with biowarfare, with chemical warfare, and with good old nuclear fire. It had wiped away planet after planet of the enemies cattle, the hated enemy's food sources, before finally following orders of the greater machines and going into sleep mode on a dead world.
Now the call had sounded out. Cattle had run amuck, even learning jumpspace technology. That meant the enemy had not been defeated, that his food source had multiplied into the trillions while the Devastator had slumbered, slowly sinking into the crust of the barren planet.
That was of no moment. Cattle could not fight back, that was why they were cattle. They knew nothing but safety and the security of numbers, willing to trade their own safety for the suffering of others. The cattle willingly marched into the pens if the pens promised safety.
The cattle were not the problem.
It was the feral intelligence that were the problem. Feral intelligence could fight. They knew nothing else. They cared for nothing else. A feral intelligence always destroyed itself once it could wield nuclear fire. The universe had proved it over and over even before the great machine had gone into slumber.
The call had sounded out, informing the machines that cattle had broken loose from the pens. The Devastator had computed that the problem would be solved quickly, with a minimum expenditure of resources, and had started to go back into slumber.
That was when the second call sounded. A feral intelligence had mastered FTL travel and had turned all of their unthinking violence against the Precursor war machines.
The Devastator considered the chances of the feral intelligence lasting long enough to withstand his brethren's assault, withstand purification and pacification.
It was mathematically insignificant. Not zero, but close enough that it required an application of resource driven computation to analyze it.
Feral intelligences always destroyed themselves.
The Devastator knew this. Had it encoded into its very bones. It did not feel the electronic version of caution as it moved into the planetary system, exiting faster than light travel. It screeched out its warcry as it exited into the system and brought up its scanners.
It felt the electronic version of anticipation as it detected orbital facilities around two planets that teemed with billions of cattle, as it tasted jumpspace wake trails, as it felt the presence of a small, insignificant amount of cattle space vessels arrayed to attempt to stand against it near the outer gas giant.
It was a waste of resources.
Cattle could not withstand machines.
It was as solid a fact as radioactive decay and as impossible to stop.
It roared and turned to accelerate toward the cattle ships waiting on the other side of the gas giant, letting them know the futility of their resistance and that nothing could stop it from destroying them any more than they could stop entropy.
It felt electronic satisfaction as nearly 10% of the cattle ships broke formation and fled for the planets.
The cattle ships lit their engines, trying to keep the gas giant between them and the great Precursor machine but the Devastator knew it would do no good. It would ensure they were caught mathematically opposite of it and begin launching subsidiary craft to destroy them and reclaim the resources of their wreckage.
The Devastator slowed as it approached the gas giant, ancient code pulsing impulses into the electronic brain at the mathematical certainty of destroying the cattle's defenses and thus weakening the hated enemy.
pssst... over here...
The transmission was in binary. The basic code, on a low band that the Devastator used to contact and exchange data with its peers. The signal origin was close, just behind it, in the gap between two point defense radars.
The Devastator tumbled as it slowed, searching with its senses to check that tiniest of gaps in its sensors. It could detect nothing out of the ordinary. The fact that the gas giant had a high level of hydrocarbon and pseudo-organic compounds was a high certainty with most gas giants of that size. The Devastator cast around, knowing the cattle had not sent that transmission.
psst... here...
This time the transmission was only a few hundred kilometers above the hull, right behind the main guns of battery-eight, between the massive cannons and the sensor array, in a gap in the coverage caused by space dust not yet cleared from the array. The Devastator ensured the cattle vessels were on the other side of the gas giant as it cast around again, looking for what could possibly be sending the message on that particular channel and rotating again to either force the transmitter to move away or hit the hull of massive Devastator.
...right here...
The Devastator felt the computer version of anxiety. A new factor had entered the computation. The voice, and the binary signal somehow had a voice, a whispering, tickling, hissing faint signal of binary on a wavelength just above the screaming particles of the foam between realspace and subspace. This time the voice had come from just below the Devastators thick hull, beneath the vessel, in a gap between the sensors in a place where its own orbital guns would not dazzle the sensors. The Devastator rolled, getting the upper sensors into place in a graceful sideways roll.
Nothing.
The Devastator was barely tracking the cattle. They were of no moment. Something was whispering on a bandwidth that was beyond organic abilities. Could it be a damaged ally, barely able to whisper for electronic assistance?
...I see you...
The Devastator heard the signal hiss to life, trickling out of empty space a few hundred kilometers away. It felt of a surge of self-defense protocol override everything else and it unleashed all of its gun at the empty space, suspecting that this possible enemy may be using some type of photo-passthrough adaptive camouflage.
Nothing.
The Devastator felt the self-preservation protocols wake up and fill some of its processors. That signal had originated from that point! Even a dust-speck would have been detected by its scanner arrays, nothing could have escaped the terrawatts of death it had unleashed.
...touch...
The Devastator felt a physical TOUCH on its housing, the decameters thick armor around the massive computer core that made up its brain. That was impossible! It was in the center of the ship, protected by layer after layer of armor, defensive mechanisms, sensors, but yet it had felt something touch the housing, press against it lightly, only a few tickles of the suggestion of pressure per square micrometer but a touch all the same.
There was a slight ripple in realspace only a few meters above the hull and the Devastator pushed itself away, firing every weapon it could bring to bear on the spot only a few atoms wide, all of its sensor questing, seeking, hunting in electronic desperation to find out what was transmitting, what was touching it!
...here...
The word was whispered from only a few meters away from the electronic "brain" of the Devastator, inside the protective housing, inside the field that would shut down biological neural function and even primitive artificial intelligences!
The Devestator felt self-protection and self-preservation programs never before accessed come online and flood into its RAM as the word was whispered at it from inside the final layer of protection.
Massive nCv cannons lowered, the housings screamed as the Devastator pushed them past the limit, to aim at its own hull. It opened fire, trying to claw into its own body in the electronic version of panic to get whatever was inside it out of it.
All of its sensors were directed into its own body. It no longer even bothered with tracking the cattle fleet. Even its astrogation and navigation programs, even the ones responsible to maintain orbit around the gas giant, were desperately racing through the circuitry, desperate to find whatever was whispering.
...over here...
The whisper was over it, on top of it, and carried sidecode of a mathematically impossible jumble of electrons arrayed in an impossible manner, with quarks whirling through electron valences, antimatter electrons in the nucleus, preons stretched to massive size taking up the place of neutrons, all with jumbling strangled mathematical codes that made no sense.
The Devastator's brain burned out the receptors to defend itself from such electronic madness.
And felt a touch upon one of the upper lobes of its quantum computer brain.
...over here...
The Devastator was throwing antivirus software out, slamming firewalls against each other, crushing ports into electronic ghosts, doing anything it could to keep out the voice. Inside the Main Computer Housing the last resort lasers began raking across anything that didn't match the original blueprints, burning away dust, odd quarks and electrons, destroying an upgraded maintenance robot that was desperately trying to detect what had touched its carapace.
From deep within the gas giant tentacles hundreds of miles long rose toward the Devastator, the ends slowly unrolling as massive graviton assisted 'suckers' on the inside of the tentacles deployed razored thorns of dark matter infused psuedo-bone.
The Devastator detected the tentacles just as they wrapped around it, the thick psuedo-protoplasmic tentacles that were thick with dark matter squeezing the Devastator's hull with impossible strength as meters thick muscles flexed with enough strength to crush the hull into itself and shatter armor over a kilometer thick.
Gibbering, raving, SCREAMING in something beyond electronic self-preservation programs would normally allow, the Devastator began to break apart, caught in the grips of the tentacles, being pulled into the gas giant.
...delicious delicious delicious...
The Devastator heard from inside its own mind as a beak nearly twenty kilometers long crushed its hull.
HELP ME, BROTHERS, PLEEEEEASE!
The beak closed and the Devastators brain flashed out of existence as the hull crushed around it.
The last thing it felt was something new. It threw data out with the cry for assistance to let its brethren know the last experience hashed data compile it had undergone. The data made no sense to the other Precursor war machines that heard the cry. A biological entity could have explained it.
Terror.
And despair.
A Desolation Class precursor war machine was assigned to discover what had caused the Devastator's intelligence collapse.
It dropped into the system and found no trace of its mechanical brethren.
Just some cattle species space craft hiding behind a gas giant, obviously intending ambushing it.
Feeling the electronic version of anticipation it moved into orbit around the gas giant, intending on forcing the cattle ships to move out of line of sight with their worlds if they wanted to stay on the opposite side of the gas giant from it. It updated its computations based on the fact that 10% of the cattle's ships had fled away from it.
It had already computed out the battle. It knew how the battle would go. While it could not detect any signs of its little brother it computed that it would simply destroy the cattle and then search. It powered up its guns and began to move it's metropolis sized bukk slowly to
...psst... over here...
---------------------
The stellar system was infested with a known species of cattle, obviously seeking to rise above themselves as the Jotun class Precursor vessel arrived in the system. It released its roar to let the cattle know not only why but who was destroying them to reclaim the resources they so foolishly squandered. It began unthawing ancient bioweapons and chemical weapons known to work upon that race, began reconfinguring its war machines to forms that had exterminated who planets of the cattle during the time that the Precursor war machine had been forged. The Jotun released over a hundred Devastator classes from its hull, computed the battle plan as they came to electronic life, then informed them of how the extermination and reclamation would progress.
They were barely into the system when a high energy signal appeared, rising from the most heavily infested planet and moving toward them. The Jotun ordered a diagnostic of its scanners when the first information came in.
It was apparently moving at .85C, but yet its progress toward the Jotun and its smaller brethren on the system map showed it moving at almost 22C. That made no sense. An object moving at .85C only approached at .85C, not at 22C.
By the time the diagnostic was done the object had gotten a third of the way toward the Jotun, crossing a quarter of the radius of the system.
The scanners reported that the energy signal, with the strength normally reserved for a quasar, was not a massive ship or an oncoming armada interlinked together, but was simply a single object the size of cattle.
Again the Jotun ordered a complete low level full diagnostic on all systems. Risky, but any object radiating that much power and moving at two different speeds required all systems were working at optimum efficiency.
It had finished just as the small object came to a stop. The Jotun focused scanning arrays on it, turning up the power to the point that it would boil away meters of armor.
The figure was a primate, half of it made up of robotics. It had some kind of sheet of material floating behind it, the movement suggesting some kind of current was effecting it and making it undulate. It was dressed in two primary colors, red and blue, had its lower legs pressed together with the toes pointing down and the upper limbs crossed over its chest, one biological the other mechanical.
"So, you're the new punk everyone's talking about," The figure stated over a wide bandwidth of wavelengths. Oddly enough, to the Jotun's sensors, sound waves travelled through vaccum almost instantly across a light second to its sensors.
The Jotun tried to compute how sound waves moved faster than light through a vacuum.
Instead of answering the Jotun and its brethren opened fire.
The figure arced through the beams as if light speed weapons were moving slow enough for it to just compute and swoop around in a resource wasting corkscrew. The Jotun realized it was racing for one of the Devastators, one clenched fist held in front of it.
The Jotun computed a 99.99999999999998 chance that the small primate would splatter against the hull of the Devastator and started to turn its attention to computing a missile firing resolution for missile bay 148 to destroy an orbital facility around the nearest planetoid.
The small figure punched straight through the Devastator, as if it was made of nebula gas instead of density collapsed armor, high tensile ceramics, and reinforced internal spaces. The Devastator's computer core shrieked with self-preservation code snippets as the figure exited the opposite side of the Devastator holding the Primary Computer Core CPU0 in its fist. It paused, looked at its fist, and shot beams of red energy from its eyes, destroying the computer core in a puff of atomic smoke.
The Jotun yanked its processing power back to the figure as it raked its gaze, still emitting beams of red energy that left ripples in jumpspace, across the side of another Devastator, tearing it open like it was made of fragile tissue, the red beams reducing the computer core to its component atoms with the briefest of touches.
Several computational nodes collapsed when trying to analyze the beams, suffering the fatal CANNOTDIVIDEBYZERO shriek of despair before imploding on themselves.
The Jotun stared in electronic shock, all his computational power trying to compute how the tiny half-mechanical primate could grab a hold on the front armor of one of the Devastators, and without any source to exert leverage against, physically move a city-sized spacecraft in an arc and throw it against another one.
According to scanners the "thrown" Devastator was only moving at 0.001C for inertia purposes yet crossed the hundreds of kilometers to the next Devastator in an amount of time that would require it to be moving at 6C.
CANNOTDIVIDEBYINFINITYDIVIDEDBYZERO
The Jotun cut loose with its weapons and goggled in electronic confusion as most of the beams and slugs were avoided, slapped aside, or ignored.
Until a nCv (near C velocity) slug the size of skyscraper hit it dead center of the chest, the impact point looking only the size of a soda can.
The Jotun's processors struggled to understand how something that size had only made an impact smaller than itself.
CANNOTSUBDIVIDETWINKIESBYCHEETOSBYZERO
The figure looked down at the tear in its suit, at the bruised biological flesh that had been exposed, then at the Jotun. It lifted a hand, extended the first finger next to the opposable thumb, and slowly waved it back and forth.
"That might have worked against a Galactic Class Klark, but it was pathetic against an Apokalypse level Injustice MCLXI Cyber-Clark," The figure said, the tone calm and confident. The meanings behind the words were gibberish to the Jotun, who devoted processor cycles to try to decode the meanings for any hint on how to defeat the creature before it.
The Jotun computed that retreat was the only option as the small primate figure set about destroying the last of the Devastators.
It began activating the engines when the primate suddenly turned in place.
"No you don't," It snapped.
Again, it sounded as if the Central Computer Core Housing had been set to atmosphere so that sound waves could be heard within it, yet a quick check showed the housing was still at almost perfect vacuum.
Sound waves cannot travel through space, a hundred diagnostic programs computed.
And promptly crashed.
Those red beams lanced out again and the Jotun braced in the microsecond it had.
It was like being brushed by the solar flare of a red giant concentrated into a piercing lance of nuclear fire. Armor exploded from energy transfer, slagged away from thermal transfer, or just ceased to exist as ravening atoms usually only found in the photosphere of a dying red sun attacked the atoms of the armor. The beam tore through mile after mile of internal structure, the figure still emitting the beam from its tiny eyes.
The Helljump engines exploded when the light touched them.
The Jotun listed, pouring debris and a cloud of atomized armor from the wound that completely bisected it.
"Done. Now let's see the face of the enemy," The figure said, slapping its hands together after it crashed/flew through the last Devastator. It reoriented on the Jotun and began to "slowly" drift toward the Jotun, moving at only 0.000003C according to some scanners but crossing the distance as if it was moving at 1.5C.
The figure flexed its primate hands and a slow smile spread across its face.
"I can't wait to rip away your housing and see you with my own eyes," the figure said, the sound waves again travelling inside the vacuum of the strategic housing.
The Jotun tried to react but the figure was suddenly pushing open armor with its two hands.
Self-preservation programs crashed trying to compute how to prevent impossibility itself from breaching critical spaces. Self-defense programs tried to compute how to defend against something that did nothing but radiate impossibility around it.
The Jotun knew what it had to do as the creature tore open the last of the hardened bulkheads protecting the Strategic Housing.
It detonated the antimatter reactor that powered the "brain" as the figure tore through the Strategic Housing and laid eyes upon the supercomputer core.
It had computed that not even the figure could withstand the direct assault of kiloton of pure antimatter point blank.
The explosion completely consumed the Jotun.
When the ravening energy disappated the red and blue figure was lying in blackness, surrounded by an expanding ring of debris and energy.
It stared at the stars and mouthed a single word.
"Ouch."
---------------------
CONFED INTELLIGENCE
TO: MANTID INTELLIGENCE
Our digitial brothers have computed a high chance that we're not looking at a handful of these Precursors, but rather an armada of them that had gone to sleep thinking everyone was dead. We concur and are buckling down for the long haul.
-----NOTHING FOLLOWS------
MANTID FREE WORLDS INTERNAL MEMO
If humankind ever wonders why it was put in this universe by some unknown creator then know that it was for this very moment.
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Black Clouds

The first droplets of rain smack the plane glass window. I stand on one side, fiddling the small recorder in one hand, and nursing a glass of scotch in the other. On the other side of the window an expansive city sprawls out in every direction, and high above it the storm that has been brewing is finally starting to burst. The rain droplets will soon be a downpour. Storms make me nervous. A thin bolt of lightning rips through the sky, momentarily illuminating the fat, heavy, dark clouds. They were plenty. No stars will show tonight. Another silent streak of light, and I see the normally bustling street below has gone quiet, save for a sparse sprinkle. Yellow cabs scurry about like insects, collecting their payments as they drop off their late night patrons.
The faint sound of rolling thunder can be heard, muffled by the thick glass of my office. Eighteen stories up, I see the rain intensifying before those below. Normally, the dampening of the window prevents all outside noise...it's important for the patients to feel safe. Now, long after my office has closed, I find the thunder far more jarring than the constant whirring of the air-conditioning system, always pumping in oxygen that somehow smells fresh and artificial simultaneously. I understand. I take another short sip of my drink and turn away from the upcoming turmoil, returning to my desk. I find my eyes drawn to the framed certificates and degrees hung about my walls, questioning their ultimate meanings.
I know that I'm safe in my office, my own personal slice of the world...but again, storms make me nervous. They didn't always, quite the opposite in fact, as a child I was rather fond of the whip-cracks in the sky, the smell of fresh rain. My distaste for them, I can actually pinpoint. Its a direct correlation of one of my patients. The one patient that scared me. Now, I've dealt with some truly sick and disturbed minds in over twenty-five years as a psychologist...but only one has ever truly frightened me. I currently hold a tape recording of our one and only session in my hand. Jack Lowe. The man was a lunatic, no doubt about that. His delusions tearing his mind pushing him further and further from reality as each second ticked away.
It was in this very office that I met Jack, and sometimes, on nights like these when I find myself unable to pry his words free from my mind, I can almost see him sitting across from me, cigarette dangling in his hand. On nights like that, like tonight, the only remedy for my obsession is to listen to the recording and drink.
I loosen my tie as I place the recorder on my desk and then I sip my scotch. I pull the bottle from the small shelf hidden under my desk and place it next to the small black device, inside of which a tape labeled "Lowe, J. Ses.1" resides. I hesitate for the briefest second before pressing play, leaning back in my chair and shutting my eyes.
"Marnie, please send in Mr. Lowe." I hear my own voice coming from the speaker.
Its so vivid...the picture in my mind that hearing his name conjures. I hear shuffling before the unmistakable sound of my office door squeaking open. I remember so clearly the man who walked through, and into my life all of those years ago. He was thin, one step above emaciated in fact, baggy clothes that wore the man instead of the other way around. He clearly had Norwegian ancestry, dirty blonde shoulder length hair that was quite messy, his unshaven cheeks gave way to a thicker patch of blonde hair on his chin that I think must have been a goatee of sorts before he had let himself go. Immediately I saw a horrendous case of insomnia, the purple skin around his sunken eyes would have been a give away for even someone wholly untrained in mental illnesses.
"Have a seat Mr. Lowe." I hear the smile in my voice.
"Just Jack..." A new voice joins the cast, and I feel the hairs on the back of my neck prickle hearing his soft almost whisper once again. I down the remainder of my glass and swiftly refill it.
"Hello Jack, I'm Doctor Harkins. Your paperwork here says you're dealing with..." I hear the sounds of papers shuffling, and silently mouth the next word in tandem with my past self. "Hallucinations?"
A period of silence follows on the recording, but my clear recollection fills in the gap. Jack, with his eyes locked on the floor nodded slowly, almost imperceptibly. There was such a distraught feeling surrounding the man and I can still feel the uneasiness shoot through my veins like ice.
"How long has this been going on, Jack?" I asked, no hint of the smile in my words.
"Its...its not a... persistent thing doc, it happened one time...I can't sleep though, I can't eat, I can't..." He trailed off. I remember him placing his hands softly on his face and rubbing the heels of his palms into his eyes. "I'm losing my fucking mind, doc...I need...something." Jack said the words with a shaky, uncertain tone.
"What do you think you need, Jack?" I asked.
"That’s why I'm here, right? To figure out a way to forget, yeah?" A slight hint of agitation permeated his voice.
"Forget...let's go back Jack...you said the hallucinations were an isolated event?" I asked.
"My Dad died, yeah, and I know shrinks like to think everything is linked to something with some or another parent thing, but it wasn't that. See, dad and me, we weren't close...not since I was a kid. He always paid more attention to my sister, even back then...she's the one who called me to tell me the news." The words flowed hectically from Jack's mouth and I remember the sheer desperation in his eyes when he looked up at me, they pleaded, begged me to hear him out and not jump to conclusions.
"Alright, go on Jack, I'd like to hear about everything." My voice conveyed a sense of calm, attempting to ease Jack, help him relax.
"You uh, care if I smoke?" He asked. I recall waving my hand in a "by all means" gesture. The soft sound of metal scraping a flint followed.
"So yeah, Dani called me and said Dad died, it's sad, but it happens right? I ask her what happened..." Jack jabbed his now burning cigarette in my direction. "Cancer, of course. What else? So, I ask her about the funeral. Two days, no problem, I'll drive down to Connecticut, spend some time with the family and honor the old mans legacy. I packed up some shit...man I can't believe I'm telling you this, you're gonna think I'm out of my fuckin' mind...hell, I probably am." The soft hiss of his cigarette burning followed his words as he took a long drag.
"I'm not here to judge you Jack. I'm here to listen to you and come up with a way to help. I don't think you're crazy." I assured him.
The cold, skeptical look he gave me, crossing his hands between his knees, dangling his cigarette...it sticks with me to this day, and I truly believe that I'll carry it to my grave. I pour my third glass.
"So I'm packing some things for a few days, and I hit the road first thing in the morning. I called Dani as soon as I left the city, telling her I'd be there tomorrow, yeah? Yeah. She tells me, 'yeah, okay, let me call Ray-' that's her husband, right, so she says 'let me call Ray, see if we can get the guest room set up in time, if not, Mom still has your old room set up back home'. She tells me she's gonna call back in fifteen, all good right?" Jack paused and looked at me inquisitively. He must have been aware of his frantic, almost manic speech pattern.
I nodded, again in unison with my past self, exactly as I remember. On cue, jack continued.
"So...I do what anyone does, toss the cell in the passenger seat and crank some tunes. I remember, some 90s boy band, but I was alone...no shame. I blasted it. It was nice out too. Green trees, blue sky. I rolled down the windows and remember, doc, I remember the air tasting and smelling so FRESH...in spite of the bad news I was feeling pretty damn great." He had glanced away at this, taking another draw off his cigarette. He felt ashamed. He thought it was wrong to feel good in light of a parents death.
"So would you say it was a pleasant drive?" I asked, beginning to pry, attempting to do exactly what his eyes had begged me not to and connect his unhealthy mental state to the death of his father.
"At first it wasn't so bad. Yeah, pleasant. But that didn't last. You know, you notice shitty drivers around you. You pay attention when cars behind or in front of you merge, or exit...but you never really pay attention to NOT having anyone else around you. It took me a while to realize that in two hours of driving I hadn't seen a single car besides mine. Now, it was still pretty early, so weird but not that weird. I did notice though that not one damned commercial had played on the radio. Just straight 90s hits..." The burning sound of cigarette paper again, followed quickly by another flick of the lighter.
Jack's leg began furiously tapping, and I recall wondering if it was anxiety or substance withdrawals.
"Dani hadn't called either." He continued after a moment. "She said 'fifteen' and it had been a couple hours by then. I just figured she got caught up dealing with Dad shit and had forgotten to call me back. Whatever, no biggie, so I pick up the phone, right, and I just punch in her digits...this is where I got fucked up, doc...because after two rings I heard that automated 'number no longer in service' message. I looked at my phone and sure enough it said Dani's name. I was confused, so I tried again, and again I got the 'dododedo'..." He imitated the electronic beeps, and raised his hands into a shrugging pose "...number not in service. You think I'm some kind of nut, yeah?" He finished, dropping his hands to his side.
"Not at all, Jack." I lied.
"Yeah, right. So anyway, I'm getting a little weirded out at this point, thinking something's wrong and then boom, it hits me. I try a different number. I call my job, back in the city. You guessed it, a robot telling me to fuck off 'cause the number just ain't in service. I call number after number, nothing. I start to think my phone is broken, so I call 911...that shits supposed to work from any phone, service or not...same...fucking...message. As if that wasn't freaky enough, doc, the second I hit the 'end call' button, the radio cuts out. Almost right away it comes back on, and you know what the song was? It was nothing. There was no song, on this channel that was apparently twenty-four seven, all 90s, no commercial gem. No, I heard the fuckin' robot voice, and she was just saying random ass numbers." He said, starting to get a flustered look on his face.
"A numbers station?" I asked, enthralled with his tale. As far-fetched as it was, I could tell that he wholeheartedly believed every word was true.
"No! Not really!" Jack said abruptly, as he stood from his chair and began to pace around the room. "1...2...1...2...that's it. That's all the robot bitch would say, over and over, 1...2...1...2. Bizarre, right? I...I thought maybe binary, but no, there was no break in the pattern. Not a single double of either digit, just 1...2 repeat."
I raised my brows and allowed my eyes to track the man, who was increasingly lost in his thoughts. He continued.
"Changing the station didn't help, and the power off button worked as well as the volume, as in they didn't. Useless. Every dial was useless. It was driving me crazy, doc...I knew I had to pull over, I was getting light-headed, and then I saw it. The only building around. I was so relieved to see other cars in the parking lot. Just a few but goddamn it was a good sight to see." He said and chuckled nervously, shaking his head in disbelief.
"If only I'd known, right? So I park and get out of my ride, and do one of those fast walks up to the building. This place was like a truck stop mixed with a convenience store, you know the kind. The type a family would stop at on their way to a vacation to get their kids snacks and drinks, yeah. So I think, 'why not grab me a snack and drink'. I was already starting to shake that paranoia and was calling myself silly, pushing the unexplainable from my mind as I opened the glass door. That little jingle bell attached to it startled me, but in a good way. It was the first non-robotic sound I'd heard in a while. Inside, it looked normal, like you'd expect. Rows of candies and chips, florescent lights shining onto white floor tiles, and most importantly there were other people. I was never happier to hear a fuckin' baby cry, man." Jack said, flopping back into his chair and lighting another smoke.
I remember now, recalling everything with the recorders aide, the way Jack's face sank. There was silence, and I take the moment to top off my scotch. I know what's coming, and the warmth the alcohol fills my body with is competing with the chill in my bones.
"Jack...?" My past self urged.
"Yeah. Yeah, right, this is where everything got fucked." He said softly, almost as if asking permission.
I nodded, and he proceeded to take the reigns, determined to tell his tale.
"When me and Dani were kids, and I'm talking little, like I was maybe eight or nine, and she was probably six... there was an accident. See, you know how when you're little you're carefree and don't think about consequences or shit? So there we were playing outside right, and we come across a knife. Like a kitchen knife. We both knew we weren't supposed to mess with shit like that, especially rusty shit that looked like it had been dropped years ago by like a family moving or something. Anyway, we thought we were badasses. Long story short, I got stabbed in the belly. It was an accident, like I said we were kids. It was pretty bad though, had to get stitches, a tetanus shot, and Dani got a good hard talking to. It left this gnarly scar. It's important, so remember it, yeah?
"Anyway, back to the convenience store. I'm noticing more people, let's see, we got crying baby and mamma, overweight trucker, bald dude in a suit, a really cute lady, and a few others. Oh yeah! The tired looking guy manning the cash register, which doubled as one of those bubblegum stands with stacks and stacks of cigarettes behind him.
"Things are looking normal, right, and I'm starting to forget about the weird shit in the car. I'm sure I just had some weird cell service and the radio was just glitchy. So I grab a bottle of pop from the back cooler and grab a bag of sunflower seeds, yeah...head to the checkout.
"Dude gives me a 'hey, anything else for you?' right, and I say 'yeah lemme get a pack of smokes' and point behind him. He turns around grabs the pack and goes to hand it to me, but freezes just as he starts to extend his arm. From his mouth comes a deep but light 'Wuhhhhhhh' sound." Jack imitated the sound and produced an eerie, unsettling noise that was like a low moan.
"I was about to ask the dude what the fuck was wrong with him, but just as I opened my mouth a loud rip of thunder cracked outside. It sounded deafening, like lightning had struck right next to me. The lights went out and the glass front of the store lit up a brilliant, electric blue. I turned my attention to it, and saw streaks of lightning slashing the sky like some huge electric god was swiping it's claws across the clouds. The blue sky was gone, and in it's place was blackness.
"I turned back to the guy behind the counter. He wasn't doing that sound anymore thank fuck, but he was still frozen in place, pack of cigarettes in his outstretched hand. I reached out for them. I don't know why I did it, but at the time I wasn't thinking clearly I guess. Anyway, I did, and as soon as my fingers touched the box of cigs...its like...like my perspective shifted or something. My vision kinda adjusted, and I could see that he was...he was a standee. A cardboard cutout. My fingers sat on the flat, glossy surface and I felt the urge, the need to press. So I did, and the flat standee with the image of the cashier on it, it fell backwards, softly dropping into the floor.
"I freaked. I gasped, unable to catch my breath. I stumbled backward into what had been a display of snacks, but now was just a rectangular protrusion sticking up from the floor with the images of snacks painted on. I bolted over to the glass window as another impossibly loud crack of thunder clapped in the sky above. Rain was beating the windows, blurring the world outside, but what I could make out was just as insane as what was happening inside.
"All of the cars aside from mine were gone, and my blue sedan sat on the edge of what looked like a cliff. I scanned with my eyes squinting, and saw that it was as if the ground had been ripped from the earth. Beyond the jagged, torn earth was blackness. Nothingness. At that point I was sure that a gigantic hand had reached down from somewhere beyond the cosmos and grabbed the convenience store and dragged it into space.
"I began to scream, turning to see that all of the other patrons were static, as flat as the cashier had been. More standees, right, and I saw that everything in the store was a farce. The rows of snacks, all fake. The displays, fake. Fuck, doc, even the big round security mirrors in the upper corners of the aisles looked like circles painted grey, not a hint of reflection to them.
"Still screaming I looked for the door. Nowhere. The door was fucking gone. I looked back to my car, and the thing...it was dissolving. Being washed away by the rain. That's when I heard a voice, echoing my own thoughts. 'what the fuck is happening!?' she said. I whipped around and saw a girl sitting on her ass, lit up by the blue glow from the constant streaks of light in the sky, I could see that she was terrified." Jack took a moment to wipe the tears that were falling down his stubbled cheeks, and lit another cigarette before speaking again.
"She looked about 19 or 20. I didn't recognize her, but she wasn't cardboard and I considered that a win. I stopped screaming and ran to her, offering her my hand. I was saying 'thank god, thank god' so happy to not be alone, you know. She looked relieved too, through her tears and terror she looked happy to see me, too. She took my hand and I helped her to her feet. As soon as she was standing her eyes widened to the point I expected they'd fall out. 'What in the fuck are those...?' she asked me in a panicky whimper. I turned to see the silhouettes standing motionlessly at the window, back-lit by the blue, contrasting their glowing red eyes. They stood shoulder to shoulder, encircling the building. Silently they stood guard as the storm raged around then. With each flash of lightning I caught a glimpse of their nightmarish, metallic surfaces. Skeletons. They were metal skeletons." Jack halfheartedly chuckled at this, clearly it was forced, judging by the way his eyes continued to pour their tears.
"Felt a little like John Conner. Not as brave though, as my instinct was to pull the girl along with me to the back of the store, trying to put as much distance between us and those...fucking things...as I could. They made no attempt to chase though. They just watched as we pressed our backs to the facade that used to be coolers. The girl was breathing hard and fast and suddenly she shrieked out 'look!' pointing a finger to an ugly green door nearby.
"We had no other options, so we booked it. We got to the door only to see that it was lacking a knob. So it seemed we were fucked, yeah? Not quite. I unleashed a fury of kicks on the bastard, forcing it open with a spray of splinters. We hurried through into a storeroom, I guess is what it was. It had what looked to me like a mop bucket and spray bottles, but I couldn't be sure since they were extremely crude and appeared to be made of papier mâché . The girl had rushed to the back of the room. 'Look!' she pointed to a ladder that was attached to the back wall.
"My eyes followed it up to see a hatch. Roof access! Almost instantly, I heard the glass front of the store shatter, the sound of hurricane like winds began to fill the building. 'Hurry!' she shouted over the gale, waving me up. I did go up. I climbed and climbed. First ten feet, then twenty, then thirty. The hatch only inching closer. I refused to look down. I KNEW that I'd been climbing for way too long, much higher than I knew the trip should have been. The hatch continued to move ever so slowly closer, and I was completely aware that the room was getting smaller as I climbed. The walls closed around me until I was surrounded by a cylinder of concrete, no wider than a manhole cover. I could hear the girl following closely, but no words were exchanged.
"Finally, after climbing hundreds of feet into the air, I'd reached the hatch door. I was terrified as I grabbed for the handle. I didn't want to lose my grip and fall into whatever hell was below. I pressed it, and opened it despite the resistance. I was able to climb out of the claustrophobic hole and onto the roof. As soon as I was free, I turned to help girl. You're probably expecting me to say something like 'she wasn't there, right?' Oh no, she was there. A fucking cardboard cutout reaching up for me. As soon as I recognized it, she fell from the ladder and softly descended into an orange glow far below. I stood, feeling the wave of anxiety crushing me, and I watched the hatch slam closed. Before I could react, a brilliant white light from above blinded me. I felt myself fading from existence, my atoms separating. I lost myself.
"The next thing I remember is the white light dissipating, and my eyesight coming back, blurry at first, but it focused as my hearing returned. I can't quite explain what I heard. It was organic but mechanical at the same time. Clicks and whirring. I blinked a few times, and blinking felt so weird, like my eyes were different. I flicked them around, and when they landed on the two absurdly tall, scale covered insectoids, I was thrown into a panic attack. I tried to move, to get away...but I found that I couldn't. I was restrained, apparently on my back, my limbs and head tightly fixed to whatever I was laying on. My rattling had drawn the attention of the creatures, who looked at me with bulbous eyes. The clicking and buzzing sounds had been coming from them, and I found that thought especially horrifying. They began frantically pressing buttons on a panel seemingly connected to whatever was holding me in place...some kind of operating table or medical bed I assume.
"Then, the strangest thing happened, doc...my head cleared and the buzzes and clicks...I began to comprehend them. I was almost able to understand. I was getting words like 'awake' and 'hurry'. Then, the most intense pain of my life ripped through my brain. I screamed, and was terrified to find that the scream wasn't my own. I heard one of the creatures clearly through the pain, and it said 'put it back in. If it crashes again we'll deal with it at that point' and the other replied 'there may be errors' as it pulled a lever. The instant that happened, I felt the sensation of dissolving again, my molecules separated and rearranged...the intense light filled my vision once more.
"Next thing I know, I'm hearing a ringing. My vision unblurred and I saw that the sound was coming from my phone, already in my hand. I look around to find that I was free of any restraints, and back in my apartment here in the city. I answered the phone and Dani's voice filled my head, distant and muffled at first, but rapidly becoming sharp and clear. 'Hey bro, just checking in on you, what have you been up to...?' she asked. 'Dani, Dani, I was on my way there, and something happened!' I shout. 'Whoa calm down, what's going on? Why were you coming here? Is everything okay?' she said. She sounded concerned, but a bit standoffish.
"I told her I was coming to the funeral. 'Who died?!' she asked. I was quiet for a moment, remembering what the insect creature had said. 'There could be errors'. I lied and told Dani it was an old friend of mine from school, and that I'd call her about it later.
"That's about it doc. That's what I've been dealing with. I don't know what to think. Am I some kind of experiment? Am I a criminal among a race of bug-aliens and this world my prison? Is this whole world, no, universe some kind of simulation just for me? Doc, I don't think I'm human, hell I'm not convinced the human race ever even existed. If I die, is it possible that all of this gets blinked out of existence? Is that possible, doc?!" Jack said through a torrent of tears.
"Jack, isn't it much more likely that this was a psychotic break? Tell me, do you have a history of drug abuse?" I ask, but just as I do, a voice from the recorder interrupts.
"Doctor, your next appointment is here." Marnie says.
"We'll pick this up next week, Jack." My past self says, and I hear myself stand from chair. I wince, dreading the last thing Jack ever said to me.
I clearly remember him standing, and raising his shirt, revealing a smooth, thin, but unscarred stomach. "Errors. There may be errors." Followed by the sound of my office door opening and closing.
A long moment of silence followed, before I heard myself ask Marnie to please cancel my remaining appointments for the day.
The recorder clicks and brings me back to the present. The storm continues outside. I find myself contemplating Jack's story for the millionth time. He never came back for his next appointment. Its entirely possible that he had simply lied about the stab wound, but the look on his face, I don't know. Is there a chance that he really did experience these outlandish things? If so, what does that imply?
Maybe that's why I decided to share this with the world tonight. I no longer wish to bear this alone. I think chronicling this, while it's definitely a breach of my confidentiality agreement, is the healthiest thing for me. I wish I could purge his story from my mind, but I can't help but be uncomfortable when it storms.
submitted by RockoCharmichael to RockosRoom [link] [comments]

A Complete Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools List for Hackers & Security Professionals

A Complete Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools List for Hackers & Security Professionals

https://i.redd.it/7hvs58an33e41.gif
Penetration testing & Hacking Tools are more often used by security industries to test the vulnerabilities in network and applications. Here you can find the Comprehensive Penetration testing & Hacking Tools list that covers Performing Penetration testing Operation in all the Environment. Penetration testing and ethical hacking tools are a very essential part of every organization to test the vulnerabilities and patch the vulnerable system.
Also, Read What is Penetration Testing? How to do Penetration Testing?
Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools ListOnline Resources – Hacking ToolsPenetration Testing Resources
Exploit Development
OSINT Resources
Social Engineering Resources
Lock Picking Resources
Operating Systems
Hacking ToolsPenetration Testing Distributions
  • Kali – GNU/Linux distribution designed for digital forensics and penetration testing Hacking Tools
  • ArchStrike – Arch GNU/Linux repository for security professionals and enthusiasts.
  • BlackArch – Arch GNU/Linux-based distribution with best Hacking Tools for penetration testers and security researchers.
  • Network Security Toolkit (NST) – Fedora-based bootable live operating system designed to provide easy access to best-of-breed open source network security applications.
  • Pentoo – Security-focused live CD based on Gentoo.
  • BackBox – Ubuntu-based distribution for penetration tests and security assessments.
  • Parrot – Distribution similar to Kali, with multiple architectures with 100 of Hacking Tools.
  • Buscador – GNU/Linux virtual machine that is pre-configured for online investigators.
  • Fedora Security Lab – provides a safe test environment to work on security auditing, forensics, system rescue, and teaching security testing methodologies.
  • The Pentesters Framework – Distro organized around the Penetration Testing Execution Standard (PTES), providing a curated collection of utilities that eliminates often unused toolchains.
  • AttifyOS – GNU/Linux distribution focused on tools useful during the Internet of Things (IoT) security assessments.
Docker for Penetration Testing
Multi-paradigm Frameworks
  • Metasploit – post-exploitation Hacking Tools for offensive security teams to help verify vulnerabilities and manage security assessments.
  • Armitage – Java-based GUI front-end for the Metasploit Framework.
  • Faraday – Multiuser integrated pentesting environment for red teams performing cooperative penetration tests, security audits, and risk assessments.
  • ExploitPack – Graphical tool for automating penetration tests that ships with many pre-packaged exploits.
  • Pupy – Cross-platform (Windows, Linux, macOS, Android) remote administration and post-exploitation tool,
Vulnerability Scanners
  • Nexpose – Commercial vulnerability and risk management assessment engine that integrates with Metasploit, sold by Rapid7.
  • Nessus – Commercial vulnerability management, configuration, and compliance assessment platform, sold by Tenable.
  • OpenVAS – Free software implementation of the popular Nessus vulnerability assessment system.
  • Vuls – Agentless vulnerability scanner for GNU/Linux and FreeBSD, written in Go.
Static Analyzers
  • Brakeman – Static analysis security vulnerability scanner for Ruby on Rails applications.
  • cppcheck – Extensible C/C++ static analyzer focused on finding bugs.
  • FindBugs – Free software static analyzer to look for bugs in Java code.
  • sobelow – Security-focused static analysis for the Phoenix Framework.
  • bandit – Security oriented static analyzer for Python code.
Web Scanners
  • Nikto – Noisy but fast black box web server and web application vulnerability scanner.
  • Arachni – Scriptable framework for evaluating the security of web applications.
  • w3af – Hacking Tools for Web application attack and audit framework.
  • Wapiti – Black box web application vulnerability scanner with built-in fuzzer.
  • SecApps – In-browser web application security testing suite.
  • WebReaver – Commercial, graphical web application vulnerability scanner designed for macOS.
  • WPScan – Hacking Tools of the Black box WordPress vulnerability scanner.
  • cms-explorer – Reveal the specific modules, plugins, components and themes that various websites powered by content management systems are running.
  • joomscan – one of the best Hacking Tools for Joomla vulnerability scanner.
  • ACSTIS – Automated client-side template injection (sandbox escape/bypass) detection for AngularJS.
Network Tools
  • zmap – Open source network scanner that enables researchers to easily perform Internet-wide network studies.
  • nmap – Free security scanner for network exploration & security audits.
  • pig – one of the Hacking Tools forGNU/Linux packet crafting.
  • scanless – Utility for using websites to perform port scans on your behalf so as not to reveal your own IP.
  • tcpdump/libpcap – Common packet analyzer that runs under the command line.
  • Wireshark – Widely-used graphical, cross-platform network protocol analyzer.
  • Network-Tools.com – Website offering an interface to numerous basic network utilities like ping, traceroute, whois, and more.
  • netsniff-ng – Swiss army knife for network sniffing.
  • Intercepter-NG – Multifunctional network toolkit.
  • SPARTA – Graphical interface offering scriptable, configurable access to existing network infrastructure scanning and enumeration tools.
  • dnschef – Highly configurable DNS proxy for pentesters.
  • DNSDumpster – one of the Hacking Tools for Online DNS recon and search service.
  • CloudFail – Unmask server IP addresses hidden behind Cloudflare by searching old database records and detecting misconfigured DNS.
  • dnsenum – Perl script that enumerates DNS information from a domain, attempts zone transfers, performs a brute force dictionary style attack and then performs reverse look-ups on the results.
  • dnsmap – One of the Hacking Tools for Passive DNS network mapper.
  • dnsrecon – One of the Hacking Tools for DNS enumeration script.
  • dnstracer – Determines where a given DNS server gets its information from, and follows the chain of DNS servers.
  • passivedns-client – Library and query tool for querying several passive DNS providers.
  • passivedns – Network sniffer that logs all DNS server replies for use in a passive DNS setup.
  • Mass Scan – best Hacking Tools for TCP port scanner, spews SYN packets asynchronously, scanning the entire Internet in under 5 minutes.
  • Zarp – Network attack tool centered around the exploitation of local networks.
  • mitmproxy – Interactive TLS-capable intercepting HTTP proxy for penetration testers and software developers.
  • Morpheus – Automated ettercap TCP/IP Hacking Tools .
  • mallory – HTTP/HTTPS proxy over SSH.
  • SSH MITM – Intercept SSH connections with a proxy; all plaintext passwords and sessions are logged to disk.
  • Netzob – Reverse engineering, traffic generation and fuzzing of communication protocols.
  • DET – Proof of concept to perform data exfiltration using either single or multiple channel(s) at the same time.
  • pwnat – Punches holes in firewalls and NATs.
  • dsniff – Collection of tools for network auditing and pentesting.
  • tgcd – Simple Unix network utility to extend the accessibility of TCP/IP based network services beyond firewalls.
  • smbmap – Handy SMB enumeration tool.
  • scapy – Python-based interactive packet manipulation program & library.
  • Dshell – Network forensic analysis framework.
  • Debookee – Simple and powerful network traffic analyzer for macOS.
  • Dripcap – Caffeinated packet analyzer.
  • Printer Exploitation Toolkit (PRET) – Tool for printer security testing capable of IP and USB connectivity, fuzzing, and exploitation of PostScript, PJL, and PCL printer language features.
  • Praeda – Automated multi-function printer data harvester for gathering usable data during security assessments.
  • routersploit – Open source exploitation framework similar to Metasploit but dedicated to embedded devices.
  • evilgrade – Modular framework to take advantage of poor upgrade implementations by injecting fake updates.
  • XRay – Network (sub)domain discovery and reconnaissance automation tool.
  • Ettercap – Comprehensive, mature suite for machine-in-the-middle attacks.
  • BetterCAP – Modular, portable and easily extensible MITM framework.
  • CrackMapExec – A swiss army knife for pentesting networks.
  • impacket – A collection of Python classes for working with network protocols.
Wireless Network Hacking Tools
  • Aircrack-ng – Set of Penetration testing & Hacking Tools list for auditing wireless networks.
  • Kismet – Wireless network detector, sniffer, and IDS.
  • Reaver – Brute force attack against Wifi Protected Setup.
  • Wifite – Automated wireless attack tool.
  • Fluxion – Suite of automated social engineering-based WPA attacks.
Transport Layer Security Tools
  • SSLyze – Fast and comprehensive TLS/SSL configuration analyzer to help identify security misconfigurations.
  • tls_prober – Fingerprint a server’s SSL/TLS implementation.
  • testssl.sh – Command-line tool which checks a server’s service on any port for the support of TLS/SSL ciphers, protocols as well as some cryptographic flaws.
Web Exploitation
  • OWASP Zed Attack Proxy (ZAP) – Feature-rich, scriptable HTTP intercepting proxy and fuzzer for penetration testing web applications.
  • Fiddler – Free cross-platform web debugging proxy with user-friendly companion tools.
  • Burp Suite – One of the Hacking Tools ntegrated platform for performing security testing of web applications.
  • autochrome – Easy to install a test browser with all the appropriate settings needed for web application testing with native Burp support, from NCCGroup.
  • Browser Exploitation Framework (BeEF) – Command and control server for delivering exploits to commandeered Web browsers.
  • Offensive Web Testing Framework (OWTF) – Python-based framework for pentesting Web applications based on the OWASP Testing Guide.
  • WordPress Exploit Framework – Ruby framework for developing and using modules which aid in the penetration testing of WordPress powered websites and systems.
  • WPSploit – Exploit WordPress-powered websites with Metasploit.
  • SQLmap – Automatic SQL injection and database takeover tool.
  • tplmap – Automatic server-side template injection and Web server takeover Hacking Tools.
  • weevely3 – Weaponized web shell.
  • Wappalyzer – Wappalyzer uncovers the technologies used on websites.
  • WhatWeb – Website fingerprinter.
  • BlindElephant – Web application fingerprinter.
  • wafw00f – Identifies and fingerprints Web Application Firewall (WAF) products.
  • fimap – Find, prepare, audit, exploit and even google automatically for LFI/RFI bugs.
  • Kadabra – Automatic LFI exploiter and scanner.
  • Kadimus – LFI scan and exploit tool.
  • liffy – LFI exploitation tool.
  • Commix – Automated all-in-one operating system command injection and exploitation tool.
  • DVCS Ripper – Rip web-accessible (distributed) version control systems: SVN/GIT/HG/BZR.
  • GitTools – One of the Hacking Tools that Automatically find and download Web-accessible .git repositories.
  • sslstrip –One of the Hacking Tools Demonstration of the HTTPS stripping attacks.
  • sslstrip2 – SSLStrip version to defeat HSTS.
  • NoSQLmap – Automatic NoSQL injection and database takeover tool.
  • VHostScan – A virtual host scanner that performs reverse lookups, can be used with pivot tools, detect catch-all scenarios, aliases, and dynamic default pages.
  • FuzzDB – Dictionary of attack patterns and primitives for black-box application fault injection and resource discovery.
  • EyeWitness – Tool to take screenshots of websites, provide some server header info, and identify default credentials if possible.
  • webscreenshot – A simple script to take screenshots of the list of websites.
Hex Editors
  • HexEdit.js – Browser-based hex editing.
  • Hexinator – World’s finest (proprietary, commercial) Hex Editor.
  • Frhed – Binary file editor for Windows.
  • 0xED – Native macOS hex editor that supports plug-ins to display custom data types.
File Format Analysis Tools
  • Kaitai Struct – File formats and network protocols dissection language and web IDE, generating parsers in C++, C#, Java, JavaScript, Perl, PHP, Python, Ruby.
  • Veles – Binary data visualization and analysis tool.
  • Hachoir – Python library to view and edit a binary stream as the tree of fields and tools for metadata extraction.
read more https://oyeitshacker.blogspot.com/2020/01/penetration-testing-hacking-tools.html
submitted by icssindia to HowToHack [link] [comments]

A Complete Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools List for Hackers & Security Professionals

A Complete Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools List for Hackers & Security Professionals

penetration-testing-hacking-tools
Penetration testing & Hacking Tools are more often used by security industries to test the vulnerabilities in network and applications. Here you can find the Comprehensive Penetration testing & Hacking Tools list that covers Performing Penetration testing Operation in all the Environment. Penetration testing and ethical hacking tools are a very essential part of every organization to test the vulnerabilities and patch the vulnerable system.
Also, Read What is Penetration Testing? How to do Penetration Testing?
Penetration Testing & Hacking Tools ListOnline Resources – Hacking ToolsPenetration Testing Resources
Exploit Development
OSINT Resources
Social Engineering Resources
Lock Picking Resources
Operating Systems
Hacking ToolsPenetration Testing Distributions
  • Kali – GNU/Linux distribution designed for digital forensics and penetration testing Hacking Tools
  • ArchStrike – Arch GNU/Linux repository for security professionals and enthusiasts.
  • BlackArch – Arch GNU/Linux-based distribution with best Hacking Tools for penetration testers and security researchers.
  • Network Security Toolkit (NST) – Fedora-based bootable live operating system designed to provide easy access to best-of-breed open source network security applications.
  • Pentoo – Security-focused live CD based on Gentoo.
  • BackBox – Ubuntu-based distribution for penetration tests and security assessments.
  • Parrot – Distribution similar to Kali, with multiple architectures with 100 of Hacking Tools.
  • Buscador – GNU/Linux virtual machine that is pre-configured for online investigators.
  • Fedora Security Lab – provides a safe test environment to work on security auditing, forensics, system rescue, and teaching security testing methodologies.
  • The Pentesters Framework – Distro organized around the Penetration Testing Execution Standard (PTES), providing a curated collection of utilities that eliminates often unused toolchains.
  • AttifyOS – GNU/Linux distribution focused on tools useful during the Internet of Things (IoT) security assessments.
Docker for Penetration Testing
Multi-paradigm Frameworks
  • Metasploit – post-exploitation Hacking Tools for offensive security teams to help verify vulnerabilities and manage security assessments.
  • Armitage – Java-based GUI front-end for the Metasploit Framework.
  • Faraday – Multiuser integrated pentesting environment for red teams performing cooperative penetration tests, security audits, and risk assessments.
  • ExploitPack – Graphical tool for automating penetration tests that ships with many pre-packaged exploits.
  • Pupy – Cross-platform (Windows, Linux, macOS, Android) remote administration and post-exploitation tool,
Vulnerability Scanners
  • Nexpose – Commercial vulnerability and risk management assessment engine that integrates with Metasploit, sold by Rapid7.
  • Nessus – Commercial vulnerability management, configuration, and compliance assessment platform, sold by Tenable.
  • OpenVAS – Free software implementation of the popular Nessus vulnerability assessment system.
  • Vuls – Agentless vulnerability scanner for GNU/Linux and FreeBSD, written in Go.
Static Analyzers
  • Brakeman – Static analysis security vulnerability scanner for Ruby on Rails applications.
  • cppcheck – Extensible C/C++ static analyzer focused on finding bugs.
  • FindBugs – Free software static analyzer to look for bugs in Java code.
  • sobelow – Security-focused static analysis for the Phoenix Framework.
  • bandit – Security oriented static analyzer for Python code.
Web Scanners
  • Nikto – Noisy but fast black box web server and web application vulnerability scanner.
  • Arachni – Scriptable framework for evaluating the security of web applications.
  • w3af – Hacking Tools for Web application attack and audit framework.
  • Wapiti – Black box web application vulnerability scanner with built-in fuzzer.
  • SecApps – In-browser web application security testing suite.
  • WebReaver – Commercial, graphical web application vulnerability scanner designed for macOS.
  • WPScan – Hacking Tools of the Black box WordPress vulnerability scanner.
  • cms-explorer – Reveal the specific modules, plugins, components and themes that various websites powered by content management systems are running.
  • joomscan – one of the best Hacking Tools for Joomla vulnerability scanner.
  • ACSTIS – Automated client-side template injection (sandbox escape/bypass) detection for AngularJS.
Network Tools
  • zmap – Open source network scanner that enables researchers to easily perform Internet-wide network studies.
  • nmap – Free security scanner for network exploration & security audits.
  • pig – one of the Hacking Tools forGNU/Linux packet crafting.
  • scanless – Utility for using websites to perform port scans on your behalf so as not to reveal your own IP.
  • tcpdump/libpcap – Common packet analyzer that runs under the command line.
  • Wireshark – Widely-used graphical, cross-platform network protocol analyzer.
  • Network-Tools.com – Website offering an interface to numerous basic network utilities like ping, traceroute, whois, and more.
  • netsniff-ng – Swiss army knife for network sniffing.
  • Intercepter-NG – Multifunctional network toolkit.
  • SPARTA – Graphical interface offering scriptable, configurable access to existing network infrastructure scanning and enumeration tools.
  • dnschef – Highly configurable DNS proxy for pentesters.
  • DNSDumpster – one of the Hacking Tools for Online DNS recon and search service.
  • CloudFail – Unmask server IP addresses hidden behind Cloudflare by searching old database records and detecting misconfigured DNS.
  • dnsenum – Perl script that enumerates DNS information from a domain, attempts zone transfers, performs a brute force dictionary style attack and then performs reverse look-ups on the results.
  • dnsmap – One of the Hacking Tools for Passive DNS network mapper.
  • dnsrecon – One of the Hacking Tools for DNS enumeration script.
  • dnstracer – Determines where a given DNS server gets its information from, and follows the chain of DNS servers.
  • passivedns-client – Library and query tool for querying several passive DNS providers.
  • passivedns – Network sniffer that logs all DNS server replies for use in a passive DNS setup.
  • Mass Scan – best Hacking Tools for TCP port scanner, spews SYN packets asynchronously, scanning the entire Internet in under 5 minutes.
  • Zarp – Network attack tool centered around the exploitation of local networks.
  • mitmproxy – Interactive TLS-capable intercepting HTTP proxy for penetration testers and software developers.
  • Morpheus – Automated ettercap TCP/IP Hacking Tools .
  • mallory – HTTP/HTTPS proxy over SSH.
  • SSH MITM – Intercept SSH connections with a proxy; all plaintext passwords and sessions are logged to disk.
  • Netzob – Reverse engineering, traffic generation and fuzzing of communication protocols.
  • DET – Proof of concept to perform data exfiltration using either single or multiple channel(s) at the same time.
  • pwnat – Punches holes in firewalls and NATs.
  • dsniff – Collection of tools for network auditing and pentesting.
  • tgcd – Simple Unix network utility to extend the accessibility of TCP/IP based network services beyond firewalls.
  • smbmap – Handy SMB enumeration tool.
  • scapy – Python-based interactive packet manipulation program & library.
  • Dshell – Network forensic analysis framework.
  • Debookee – Simple and powerful network traffic analyzer for macOS.
  • Dripcap – Caffeinated packet analyzer.
  • Printer Exploitation Toolkit (PRET) – Tool for printer security testing capable of IP and USB connectivity, fuzzing, and exploitation of PostScript, PJL, and PCL printer language features.
  • Praeda – Automated multi-function printer data harvester for gathering usable data during security assessments.
  • routersploit – Open source exploitation framework similar to Metasploit but dedicated to embedded devices.
  • evilgrade – Modular framework to take advantage of poor upgrade implementations by injecting fake updates.
  • XRay – Network (sub)domain discovery and reconnaissance automation tool.
  • Ettercap – Comprehensive, mature suite for machine-in-the-middle attacks.
  • BetterCAP – Modular, portable and easily extensible MITM framework.
  • CrackMapExec – A swiss army knife for pentesting networks.
  • impacket – A collection of Python classes for working with network protocols.
Wireless Network Hacking Tools
  • Aircrack-ng – Set of Penetration testing & Hacking Tools list for auditing wireless networks.
  • Kismet – Wireless network detector, sniffer, and IDS.
  • Reaver – Brute force attack against Wifi Protected Setup.
  • Wifite – Automated wireless attack tool.
  • Fluxion – Suite of automated social engineering-based WPA attacks.
Transport Layer Security Tools
  • SSLyze – Fast and comprehensive TLS/SSL configuration analyzer to help identify security misconfigurations.
  • tls_prober – Fingerprint a server’s SSL/TLS implementation.
  • testssl.sh – Command-line tool which checks a server’s service on any port for the support of TLS/SSL ciphers, protocols as well as some cryptographic flaws.
Web Exploitation
  • OWASP Zed Attack Proxy (ZAP) – Feature-rich, scriptable HTTP intercepting proxy and fuzzer for penetration testing web applications.
  • Fiddler – Free cross-platform web debugging proxy with user-friendly companion tools.
  • Burp Suite – One of the Hacking Tools ntegrated platform for performing security testing of web applications.
  • autochrome – Easy to install a test browser with all the appropriate settings needed for web application testing with native Burp support, from NCCGroup.
  • Browser Exploitation Framework (BeEF) – Command and control server for delivering exploits to commandeered Web browsers.
  • Offensive Web Testing Framework (OWTF) – Python-based framework for pentesting Web applications based on the OWASP Testing Guide.
  • WordPress Exploit Framework – Ruby framework for developing and using modules which aid in the penetration testing of WordPress powered websites and systems.
  • WPSploit – Exploit WordPress-powered websites with Metasploit.
  • SQLmap – Automatic SQL injection and database takeover tool.
  • tplmap – Automatic server-side template injection and Web server takeover Hacking Tools.
  • weevely3 – Weaponized web shell.
  • Wappalyzer – Wappalyzer uncovers the technologies used on websites.
  • WhatWeb – Website fingerprinter.
  • BlindElephant – Web application fingerprinter.
  • wafw00f – Identifies and fingerprints Web Application Firewall (WAF) products.
  • fimap – Find, prepare, audit, exploit and even google automatically for LFI/RFI bugs.
  • Kadabra – Automatic LFI exploiter and scanner.
  • Kadimus – LFI scan and exploit tool.
  • liffy – LFI exploitation tool.
  • Commix – Automated all-in-one operating system command injection and exploitation tool.
  • DVCS Ripper – Rip web-accessible (distributed) version control systems: SVN/GIT/HG/BZR.
  • GitTools – One of the Hacking Tools that Automatically find and download Web-accessible .git repositories.
  • sslstrip –One of the Hacking Tools Demonstration of the HTTPS stripping attacks.
  • sslstrip2 – SSLStrip version to defeat HSTS.
  • NoSQLmap – Automatic NoSQL injection and database takeover tool.
  • VHostScan – A virtual host scanner that performs reverse lookups, can be used with pivot tools, detect catch-all scenarios, aliases, and dynamic default pages.
  • FuzzDB – Dictionary of attack patterns and primitives for black-box application fault injection and resource discovery.
  • EyeWitness – Tool to take screenshots of websites, provide some server header info, and identify default credentials if possible.
  • webscreenshot – A simple script to take screenshots of the list of websites.
Hex Editors
  • HexEdit.js – Browser-based hex editing.
  • Hexinator – World’s finest (proprietary, commercial) Hex Editor.
  • Frhed – Binary file editor for Windows.
  • 0xED – Native macOS hex editor that supports plug-ins to display custom data types.
File Format Analysis Tools
  • Kaitai Struct – File formats and network protocols dissection language and web IDE, generating parsers in C++, C#, Java, JavaScript, Perl, PHP, Python, Ruby.
  • Veles – Binary data visualization and analysis tool.
  • Hachoir – Python library to view and edit a binary stream as the tree of fields and tools for metadata extraction.
read more https://oyeitshacker.blogspot.com/2020/01/penetration-testing-hacking-tools.html
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